Admin1: What would you say is the dream of every Alphysics Doctor to achieve in his career?
Dr. Gravytee: To make a definition and have it named after yourself.
A1: That doesn't seem like a big deal.
Dr. G: I didn't want to raise anyone's hopes. The ultimate dream of any Alphysics Doctor is to start a school named after himself.
A1: I see. If your name is not Newton don't even try.
Dr. G: The second ultimate dream is to have a unit named after yourself.
A1: Not likely either.
Dr. G: There is a current war among Doctors of Alphysics to create a unit of surface. But there is no clear winner yet. As usual in such turf wars Doctors will perpetuate the war as long as they can and squeeze every ounce of publication possibilities. This way the process of negotiations itself becomes a legal scholastic discipline. The whole thing may last about a century.
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Alphysics of Alphysics
Admin1: How much alphysics do alphysicists use to do their work?
Dr. Gravytee: None.
A1: What do you use if not alphysics?
Dr. G: We use back of the envelope calculations then translate it to alphysics.
Dr. Gravytee: None.
A1: What do you use if not alphysics?
Dr. G: We use back of the envelope calculations then translate it to alphysics.
Friday, December 29, 2006
What is Science
Admin1: Who defines science?
Doctor Gravity: Big Media defines science.
A1: What is science?
Dr. G: Science is what sells.
A1: How do we know it is science.
Dr. G: Go to science section.
Doctor Gravity: Big Media defines science.
A1: What is science?
Dr. G: Science is what sells.
A1: How do we know it is science.
Dr. G: Go to science section.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Never Simplify, Popularize
Admin1: Why do Doctors of Alphysics always popularize but never simplify?
Dr. Gravytee: If we simplify an equation we would get either an identity or a proportionality. If we popularize we may get a book contract.
A1: If you simplify you lose all your authority. If your equation is publicly legible your authority is not needed.
Dr. G: A Doctor of Alphysics has infinite authority.
A1: Infinite authority?
Dr. G: Yes. No force in the universe can revoke our license called the PhD which endows us with authority.
Dr. Gravytee: If we simplify an equation we would get either an identity or a proportionality. If we popularize we may get a book contract.
A1: If you simplify you lose all your authority. If your equation is publicly legible your authority is not needed.
Dr. G: A Doctor of Alphysics has infinite authority.
A1: Infinite authority?
Dr. G: Yes. No force in the universe can revoke our license called the PhD which endows us with authority.
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
Legalize Absurd
Admin1: Historians discovered that Newton titled his book Scholastic Principles of Mathematical Philosophy but the printer goofed and had the title set as Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy.
Dr. Gravytee: This is wishful thinking on the parts of historians. Newton would never have allowed such a thing to happen.
A1: You mean Newton would have proofread the galleys and made sure that the title was correct?
Dr. G: No. Newton wrote his Principia to be the monumental book of the Scholastic Principles of Mathematical Philosophy.
A1: Why didn't he use that title then?
Dr. G: Newton is the greatest marketing genius of all times. In marketing only one thing matters: You must talk to your market in the language your market would understand.
A1: Who was Newton's market.
Dr. G: Newton knew very well who his market was. Newton wrote his monumental book for his Scholastic colleagues.
A1: This makes sense. Only Scholastic Doctors of Philosophy could read books.
Dr. G: Scholastic Doctors of Theology were included in the audience Newton was aiming. Newton wrote for International Scholastic Doctors around the globe.
A1: Principia does not speak the language of scholasticism. It is a mathematical treatise. It is the most famous science book ever written.
Dr. G: Did you read Newton's Principia.
A1: Sure.
Dr. G: You mean you read the initial chapters where Newton discusses old scholastic subjects such as time, space, gravity, force, the universe, god's role in governing the universe and great polemical experiments such as the bucket experiment.
A1: Yes. I read all of that.
Dr. G: This is Newton's genius. Newton invented mathematical by association and experimental by association methods. By writing about philosophy and geometry under the same cover Newton united two scholastic disciplines.
A1: Doctors of Philosophy of today still use experimental by association.
Dr. G: Of course. It is a brilliant fraud against science.
A1: So all Newton did was to change the official language of scholasticism so that Doctors now philosophized with mathematics instead of Latin.
Dr. G: Philosophy is an old discipline. There is nothing wrong with philosophy as a scientific endeavor if done by scientists. Doctors of Philosophy are not scientists and they are not philosophers either. They are corruptors of languages. A Doctor of Philosophy is in fact a Doctor of the Absurd.
A1: Was absurd invented by Newton too?
Dr. G: No. Newton did not invent the absurd. Newton made the absurd legal in Scholasticism.
A1: How?
Dr. G: It was known for millennia that if you compare apples and oranges you would obtain an absurd result. Geometry and mathematics were good frameworks to investigate nature and they gave good results because it was forbidden to use mixed proportionalities in mathematics. Mixed proportionality is the comparison of apples and oranges.
A1: Did Newton make mixed proportionalities legal?
Dr. G: Open the best science book ever written and read the reference that I have given you. All of the absurd manufactured last three hundred years by Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy can be traced to Newton's marketing genius. He opened a whole new possibilities for Doctors to write commentary on by legalizing the absurd.
A1: If we make Newton illegal would we recover science?
Dr. G: We would. Post-Newtonian generation will enjoy Freedom of Science.
Dr. Gravytee: This is wishful thinking on the parts of historians. Newton would never have allowed such a thing to happen.
A1: You mean Newton would have proofread the galleys and made sure that the title was correct?
Dr. G: No. Newton wrote his Principia to be the monumental book of the Scholastic Principles of Mathematical Philosophy.
A1: Why didn't he use that title then?
Dr. G: Newton is the greatest marketing genius of all times. In marketing only one thing matters: You must talk to your market in the language your market would understand.
A1: Who was Newton's market.
Dr. G: Newton knew very well who his market was. Newton wrote his monumental book for his Scholastic colleagues.
A1: This makes sense. Only Scholastic Doctors of Philosophy could read books.
Dr. G: Scholastic Doctors of Theology were included in the audience Newton was aiming. Newton wrote for International Scholastic Doctors around the globe.
A1: Principia does not speak the language of scholasticism. It is a mathematical treatise. It is the most famous science book ever written.
Dr. G: Did you read Newton's Principia.
A1: Sure.
Dr. G: You mean you read the initial chapters where Newton discusses old scholastic subjects such as time, space, gravity, force, the universe, god's role in governing the universe and great polemical experiments such as the bucket experiment.
A1: Yes. I read all of that.
Dr. G: This is Newton's genius. Newton invented mathematical by association and experimental by association methods. By writing about philosophy and geometry under the same cover Newton united two scholastic disciplines.
A1: Doctors of Philosophy of today still use experimental by association.
Dr. G: Of course. It is a brilliant fraud against science.
A1: So all Newton did was to change the official language of scholasticism so that Doctors now philosophized with mathematics instead of Latin.
Dr. G: Philosophy is an old discipline. There is nothing wrong with philosophy as a scientific endeavor if done by scientists. Doctors of Philosophy are not scientists and they are not philosophers either. They are corruptors of languages. A Doctor of Philosophy is in fact a Doctor of the Absurd.
A1: Was absurd invented by Newton too?
Dr. G: No. Newton did not invent the absurd. Newton made the absurd legal in Scholasticism.
A1: How?
Dr. G: It was known for millennia that if you compare apples and oranges you would obtain an absurd result. Geometry and mathematics were good frameworks to investigate nature and they gave good results because it was forbidden to use mixed proportionalities in mathematics. Mixed proportionality is the comparison of apples and oranges.
A1: Did Newton make mixed proportionalities legal?
Dr. G: Open the best science book ever written and read the reference that I have given you. All of the absurd manufactured last three hundred years by Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy can be traced to Newton's marketing genius. He opened a whole new possibilities for Doctors to write commentary on by legalizing the absurd.
A1: If we make Newton illegal would we recover science?
Dr. G: We would. Post-Newtonian generation will enjoy Freedom of Science.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
How stuff is made
Admin1: In How stuff is made Natalie Jeremijenko is interested in investigating how stuff is made.
Doctor Gravytee: Alphysics is about how stuff is made as well. We are very interested about building blocks of the universe and the stuff which makes up the universe and even more, we are also interested in the stuff which does not make up our universe.
A1: Dark Matter.
Dr. Gravytee: If everything were visible that would be too boring.
A1: Assume that semi-famous Alphysics Doctor Lisa Randall decides to study how stuff is made. She picks up one of the same projects from the How stuff is made site: how are fortune cookies are made?
Dr. G: Lisa Randall too is interested in how stuff is made. But there is a difference. Natalie is a scientist. Lisa Randall is a Scholastic Alphysics Doctor. They think differently. To investigate how stuff is made Natalie investigates how stuff is made. Natalie does not try to fit how stuff is made into a 17th century doctrine. Lisa Randall has her doctrine and wants to fit nature into that doctrine. To investigate how stuff is made Lisa Randall does not investigate how stuff is made. She already knows how stuff is made, she is after absolutes.
A1: So Randall will apply her doctrines learned from books to the manufacture of cookies.
Dr. G: Doctor Randall would say that fortune cookies are made in China by Chinese by 17th century methods called the Standard Model of making cookies. Then Lisa would write down equations that will reveal all of the messages in all of the universes that one can find in fortune cookies. This great discovery she will call Lisa’s Theory of Everything.
A1: But fortune cookies are manufactured in Philadelphia.
Dr. G: Faced with this experimental fact Doctor Randall will simply use her immense mathematical skills and write
Philadelphia = China
A1: That looks like a definition.
Dr. G: If Philadelphia = China is written in Nambu-Goto flavored action in AdS/CFT renormalized correspondence space you cannot tell that it is a definition.
Doctor Gravytee: Alphysics is about how stuff is made as well. We are very interested about building blocks of the universe and the stuff which makes up the universe and even more, we are also interested in the stuff which does not make up our universe.
A1: Dark Matter.
Dr. Gravytee: If everything were visible that would be too boring.
A1: Assume that semi-famous Alphysics Doctor Lisa Randall decides to study how stuff is made. She picks up one of the same projects from the How stuff is made site: how are fortune cookies are made?
Dr. G: Lisa Randall too is interested in how stuff is made. But there is a difference. Natalie is a scientist. Lisa Randall is a Scholastic Alphysics Doctor. They think differently. To investigate how stuff is made Natalie investigates how stuff is made. Natalie does not try to fit how stuff is made into a 17th century doctrine. Lisa Randall has her doctrine and wants to fit nature into that doctrine. To investigate how stuff is made Lisa Randall does not investigate how stuff is made. She already knows how stuff is made, she is after absolutes.
A1: So Randall will apply her doctrines learned from books to the manufacture of cookies.
Dr. G: Doctor Randall would say that fortune cookies are made in China by Chinese by 17th century methods called the Standard Model of making cookies. Then Lisa would write down equations that will reveal all of the messages in all of the universes that one can find in fortune cookies. This great discovery she will call Lisa’s Theory of Everything.
A1: But fortune cookies are manufactured in Philadelphia.
Dr. G: Faced with this experimental fact Doctor Randall will simply use her immense mathematical skills and write
Philadelphia = China
A1: That looks like a definition.
Dr. G: If Philadelphia = China is written in Nambu-Goto flavored action in AdS/CFT renormalized correspondence space you cannot tell that it is a definition.
Monday, December 25, 2006
Fundamenal Research
Admin1: Doctors of Alphysics claim that Alphysics is the only tool that can be used to do fundamental research.
Dr. Gravytee: The reason is Doctors of Alphysics are ignorant of history. They confuse professional mythology they learn at school with history. Alphysics education does not include a study of alphysics history. An average Doctor's knowledge of alphysics history is limited with the sidebars in Halliday & Resnick. The entire education of Doctors is dedicated in learning skills like solving partial differential equations and memorizing professional mythology such as what a great genius Newton was, has been, is and will be. In order to worship their God Newton Doctors of Alphysics invented a special prayer book called Celestial Mechanics.
A1: Celestial Mechanics is astronomy loaded with Newtonian symbols of vanishing kind.
Dr. G: Doctors eliminate those symbols and recover astronomy and congratulate themselve for saving Newton's authority. They call this ritual derivation.
A1: Why not use astronomy directly?
Dr. G: Are you suggesting that we stop hailing Newton's authority by not following exactly the laws he set out for us to follow?
A1: My apologies. I did not intend to propose such a scientific and revolutionary concept.
Dr. G: Doctors think high level frameworks they invented such as Celestial Mechanics, Mathematicism or Alphysics are tools with which they can do fundamental research because Newton told them so. But Alphysics as a whole has units and it is not suited for fundamental research it is only suited for philosophizing. And philosophy is what Doctors of Alphysics do.
A1: I see. You cannot study the fundamental with a tool which is not fundamental you can only write polemical philosophy with it.
Dr. G: Luckily Doctors of Alphysics have the hereditary authority to define what fundamental is. Therefore, each Doctor defines what he is doing at the moment as fundamental research which is about to reveal the most fundamental secrets of the universe.
Dr. Gravytee: The reason is Doctors of Alphysics are ignorant of history. They confuse professional mythology they learn at school with history. Alphysics education does not include a study of alphysics history. An average Doctor's knowledge of alphysics history is limited with the sidebars in Halliday & Resnick. The entire education of Doctors is dedicated in learning skills like solving partial differential equations and memorizing professional mythology such as what a great genius Newton was, has been, is and will be. In order to worship their God Newton Doctors of Alphysics invented a special prayer book called Celestial Mechanics.
A1: Celestial Mechanics is astronomy loaded with Newtonian symbols of vanishing kind.
Dr. G: Doctors eliminate those symbols and recover astronomy and congratulate themselve for saving Newton's authority. They call this ritual derivation.
A1: Why not use astronomy directly?
Dr. G: Are you suggesting that we stop hailing Newton's authority by not following exactly the laws he set out for us to follow?
A1: My apologies. I did not intend to propose such a scientific and revolutionary concept.
Dr. G: Doctors think high level frameworks they invented such as Celestial Mechanics, Mathematicism or Alphysics are tools with which they can do fundamental research because Newton told them so. But Alphysics as a whole has units and it is not suited for fundamental research it is only suited for philosophizing. And philosophy is what Doctors of Alphysics do.
A1: I see. You cannot study the fundamental with a tool which is not fundamental you can only write polemical philosophy with it.
Dr. G: Luckily Doctors of Alphysics have the hereditary authority to define what fundamental is. Therefore, each Doctor defines what he is doing at the moment as fundamental research which is about to reveal the most fundamental secrets of the universe.
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Newton's Wig
Admin1: An authority symbol always becomes fodder for jokes for the next generation.
Dr. Gravytee: The word Newton has been a synonym for genius and science since eternity.
A1: Why was he wearing a wig?
Dr. G: That was cool at the time.
A1: You are saying that if the brand is set up professionally and maintained well and updated carefully the symbols of authority will never become jokes.
Dr. G: Newton is backed up by the most sophisticated marketing department in the world.
A1: Newton's contemporaries from Holland used elaborate lace collars as authority symbols.
Dr. G: More likely as status symbols. But your status brought authority as well.
A1: Will this symbol of authority ever become fodder for jokes?
Dr. G: It looks remarkably like fine lace worn by the Dutch. Authority symbols work both ways. They also imprison its owner. When you have a Lagrangian around your neck that's more like a garrote than a decoration.
A1: According to the author of that link Lagrangian is on its way out.
Dr. G: There is a confusion there. Alphysics is divided in its use of lace. Doctor Carroll who dismisses Lagragian practices at CalTech where Lagrangian is fashionable. At University of Chicago only Hamiltonian is used. These formalisms come and go.
A1: To me a Lagrangian looks as old fashioned and funny as lace collar. I wonder why it is still around.
Dr. G: Today we have computer programs which do what Lagrangian was invented to do in the 18th century. The scholastic alphysics bureaucracy is an immense bureaucracy. Once the Lagrangian entered the books it could never be removed.
A1: So if alphysics Doctors were in charge of developing writing instruments for humanity we would still be writing with quill pens not typing on a keyboard.
Dr. G: You got the idea.
Dr. Gravytee: The word Newton has been a synonym for genius and science since eternity.
A1: Why was he wearing a wig?
Dr. G: That was cool at the time.
A1: You are saying that if the brand is set up professionally and maintained well and updated carefully the symbols of authority will never become jokes.
Dr. G: Newton is backed up by the most sophisticated marketing department in the world.
A1: Newton's contemporaries from Holland used elaborate lace collars as authority symbols.
Dr. G: More likely as status symbols. But your status brought authority as well.
A1: Will this symbol of authority ever become fodder for jokes?
Dr. G: It looks remarkably like fine lace worn by the Dutch. Authority symbols work both ways. They also imprison its owner. When you have a Lagrangian around your neck that's more like a garrote than a decoration.
A1: According to the author of that link Lagrangian is on its way out.
Dr. G: There is a confusion there. Alphysics is divided in its use of lace. Doctor Carroll who dismisses Lagragian practices at CalTech where Lagrangian is fashionable. At University of Chicago only Hamiltonian is used. These formalisms come and go.
A1: To me a Lagrangian looks as old fashioned and funny as lace collar. I wonder why it is still around.
Dr. G: Today we have computer programs which do what Lagrangian was invented to do in the 18th century. The scholastic alphysics bureaucracy is an immense bureaucracy. Once the Lagrangian entered the books it could never be removed.
A1: So if alphysics Doctors were in charge of developing writing instruments for humanity we would still be writing with quill pens not typing on a keyboard.
Dr. G: You got the idea.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Scholasticism is Cool
Admin1: There is a new post in Freedom of Science describing how Doctors of Alphysics write their papers. Do you agree?
Doctor Gravytee: Yes. This is how modern Aphysics papers are written. I agree with most of it. I never read any papers written by another Doctor of Alphysics. There is no point. It is a total waste of time. I skim the title and the summary in the arxiv.org and I write my own stuff. Remember that you don't get academic points for reading papers. You get academic points for publishing papers.
A1: What about the shampoo analogy.
Dr. G: He may have gone overboard with the shampoo analogy but it is true in its essence. He is definitely right about the sleaze factor. When you read the blogs of Doctors of Strings employed by venerable institutions such as Columbia and Harvard Universities you would be shocked how sleazy can these people get. If there is science pornography they are it.
A1: Your blog is clean.
Dr. G: We are about Alphysics not about string theory. Alphysics is an old tradition. String theory is on its way out.
Doctor Gravytee: Yes. This is how modern Aphysics papers are written. I agree with most of it. I never read any papers written by another Doctor of Alphysics. There is no point. It is a total waste of time. I skim the title and the summary in the arxiv.org and I write my own stuff. Remember that you don't get academic points for reading papers. You get academic points for publishing papers.
A1: What about the shampoo analogy.
Dr. G: He may have gone overboard with the shampoo analogy but it is true in its essence. He is definitely right about the sleaze factor. When you read the blogs of Doctors of Strings employed by venerable institutions such as Columbia and Harvard Universities you would be shocked how sleazy can these people get. If there is science pornography they are it.
A1: Your blog is clean.
Dr. G: We are about Alphysics not about string theory. Alphysics is an old tradition. String theory is on its way out.
Friday, December 22, 2006
Science, Progress and Garages
Admin1: Yippee! Congratulations! You had your first comment!
Dr. Gravytee: Nothing to be excited about. I get thousands of comments every day. I just thought this one was the first one worth approving.
A1: I see. I agree with everything your anonymous commenter said.
Dr. G: I don't.
A1: Obviously science is not a unit that is measured.
Dr. G: We can measure progress if we define a unit for it. I defined the unit to measure progress as the building of a mechanical clock. The commenter gave that as an example of one of the greatest achievements of Europeans.
A1: What about thousands of years humans spent to discover the alphabet.
Dr. G: Alphabet is an agreed upon set of symbols. What humans needed to discover was that only when parties agree upon a standard that communication becomes possible. Today our real alphabet is the QWERTY keyboard which has many more symbols than the "classic" alphabet still taught in schools out of scholastic inertia.
A1: You are so impressed with the present century. Without the previous centuries we wouldn't be here.
Dr. G: I don't subscribe to the continuous progress view. The break from the European scholastic tradition when pilgrims migrated to the new continent made this century possible not a build up on European scholasticism.
A1: There are more scientists today than in previous centuries.
Dr. G: Regular folks/Doctors ratio has stayed the same throughout history. The amateur scientist/Doctors ratio is also a constant. Amateur scientist type mentioned by the commenter always makes the new discoveries. Edison comes to mind. These are the people who tinker in their garages and discover new stuff. Doctors park their cars in their garages.
Dr. Gravytee: Nothing to be excited about. I get thousands of comments every day. I just thought this one was the first one worth approving.
A1: I see. I agree with everything your anonymous commenter said.
Dr. G: I don't.
A1: Obviously science is not a unit that is measured.
Dr. G: We can measure progress if we define a unit for it. I defined the unit to measure progress as the building of a mechanical clock. The commenter gave that as an example of one of the greatest achievements of Europeans.
A1: What about thousands of years humans spent to discover the alphabet.
Dr. G: Alphabet is an agreed upon set of symbols. What humans needed to discover was that only when parties agree upon a standard that communication becomes possible. Today our real alphabet is the QWERTY keyboard which has many more symbols than the "classic" alphabet still taught in schools out of scholastic inertia.
A1: You are so impressed with the present century. Without the previous centuries we wouldn't be here.
Dr. G: I don't subscribe to the continuous progress view. The break from the European scholastic tradition when pilgrims migrated to the new continent made this century possible not a build up on European scholasticism.
A1: There are more scientists today than in previous centuries.
Dr. G: Regular folks/Doctors ratio has stayed the same throughout history. The amateur scientist/Doctors ratio is also a constant. Amateur scientist type mentioned by the commenter always makes the new discoveries. Edison comes to mind. These are the people who tinker in their garages and discover new stuff. Doctors park their cars in their garages.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Same Doctors Different Name
Admin1: All the raw materials needed to discover radio waves were in existence 2000 years ago.
Doctor Gravytee: True. Look at Hertz' experiment it is so simple and beautiful.
A1: Why didn't anybody else thought about it before?
Dr. G: The European society was based on a scholastic model where a professional priestly group controlled the human knowledge database.
A1: Just like the monopoly Doctors of Alphysics enjoy on human reason?
Dr. G: Same doctors different name. Doctors allowed only a handful of people to work in science. If instead of 10, there were 100,000 human beings working on science and technology fields then there would be more scientific discoveries done faster.
A1: But there were great scientific discoveries made in Europe, such as great mechanical clocks.
Dr. G: Today the progress humans make every year is more than the Scholastic Europeans could make in 2000 years. Therefore if you think human potential equals building a mechanical clock in 2000 years of civilization then you may consider that a great advance. But I don't believe that it is. Take the advance of mechanical clock in 2000 years as unit of human potential. I would say that human potential is more than that? How much more?
A1: Maybe million times more?
Dr. G: How about a billion times more. It is only European self-serving propaganda to market 1/1,000,000,000 progress to be epitome of scientific progress. There is no discernible European progress in 2000 years when you compare that progress to the rate of advancement of today.
A1: That's very little progress.
Dr. G: The estimate above is actually favorable to Europeans. In reality there was negative progress. Humans are still trying to recover from the intellectual scars inflicted by Doctors on humanity. Consider that European Doctors burned alive any poor soul who dared to show any feeble signs of scientific thinking.
Doctor Gravytee: True. Look at Hertz' experiment it is so simple and beautiful.
A1: Why didn't anybody else thought about it before?
Dr. G: The European society was based on a scholastic model where a professional priestly group controlled the human knowledge database.
A1: Just like the monopoly Doctors of Alphysics enjoy on human reason?
Dr. G: Same doctors different name. Doctors allowed only a handful of people to work in science. If instead of 10, there were 100,000 human beings working on science and technology fields then there would be more scientific discoveries done faster.
A1: But there were great scientific discoveries made in Europe, such as great mechanical clocks.
Dr. G: Today the progress humans make every year is more than the Scholastic Europeans could make in 2000 years. Therefore if you think human potential equals building a mechanical clock in 2000 years of civilization then you may consider that a great advance. But I don't believe that it is. Take the advance of mechanical clock in 2000 years as unit of human potential. I would say that human potential is more than that? How much more?
A1: Maybe million times more?
Dr. G: How about a billion times more. It is only European self-serving propaganda to market 1/1,000,000,000 progress to be epitome of scientific progress. There is no discernible European progress in 2000 years when you compare that progress to the rate of advancement of today.
A1: That's very little progress.
Dr. G: The estimate above is actually favorable to Europeans. In reality there was negative progress. Humans are still trying to recover from the intellectual scars inflicted by Doctors on humanity. Consider that European Doctors burned alive any poor soul who dared to show any feeble signs of scientific thinking.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
A Billion Derived Equations
Admin1: You don’t want to buy 13 crappy songs on a CD big publishers want to sell you so that you can have 1 song that you like. Same with alphysics. What crap you buy in alphysics in order to get 1 thing you want?
Dr. Gravytee: In alphysics you get about a billion derived equations which are useless variations on one fundamental idea: R3T2.
Dr. Gravytee: In alphysics you get about a billion derived equations which are useless variations on one fundamental idea: R3T2.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
The Hierarchy Problem
Admin1: What is the hierarchy problem in Alphysics?
Doctor Gravytee: Hierarchy problem occurs when the fundamental parameters of fame of practitioners in the String Theory Lagrangian field are vastly different (usually academically incompatible) than the parameters evaluated and assumed to exist experimentally by practitioners themselves.
A1: You mean there is an absolute hierarchy in the String Theory?
Dr. G: Hierarchy is absolute because each practitioner in String Theory overly overestimates his authority mass. But professional academic mythology prescribes an absolutely true measurement of authority proportional to number of papers published plus seniority plus rank.
A1: I know this is called renormalization.
Dr. G: Typically the renormalized parameters are closely related to the fundamental parameters self-estimated by practitioners, but in some cases, it appears that there has been a delicate cancellation between the fundamental quantity and the quantum corrections to it. Therefore, it is clear that hierarchy problem is related to fine-tuning problems and the problems of naturalness.
A1: An example please.
Dr. G: A famous Doctor of Alphysics, Doctor Weinberg is a Nobel laureate and measures his authority mass by heavily weighing in his Nobel prize, and therefore he places his absolute position in the hierarchy of Alphysics to be on top, at least nearly on top, maybe just below Einstein. Doctor Weinberg claims that it is an experimental fact that he is a top tier Alphysicist. Doctor Weinberg assumes academic renormalization and counts his Nobel as fine-tuning bonus.
A1: This is an experimental fact if there is any in Alphysics.
Dr. G: But Doctor of Philosophy Doctor Greene has vastly more fame than Doctor Weinberg and Doctor Greene's measurements of his authority shows exceptionally high elegantly fine tuning of fine-tuning terms and furthermore Doctor Greene adds some clever quantum corrections to his status connected to the vacuum oscillations created by his best-seller books in the Amazon spacetimes indicators and creates not only a hierarchy problem but a true hierarchy crisis.
A1: I see. Doctor Weinberg could not agree that his Nobel counts nothing against the elegant tunings of Doctor Greene just because Greene sold more books.
Dr. G: Greene on the other hand claims that Weinberg's Nobel renormalized well when it was new but now it is old news and it has re-depracated beyond re-renormalization. This is the hierarchy problem. It is fascinating science. This is the cutting edge of Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Hierarchy problem occurs when the fundamental parameters of fame of practitioners in the String Theory Lagrangian field are vastly different (usually academically incompatible) than the parameters evaluated and assumed to exist experimentally by practitioners themselves.
A1: You mean there is an absolute hierarchy in the String Theory?
Dr. G: Hierarchy is absolute because each practitioner in String Theory overly overestimates his authority mass. But professional academic mythology prescribes an absolutely true measurement of authority proportional to number of papers published plus seniority plus rank.
A1: I know this is called renormalization.
Dr. G: Typically the renormalized parameters are closely related to the fundamental parameters self-estimated by practitioners, but in some cases, it appears that there has been a delicate cancellation between the fundamental quantity and the quantum corrections to it. Therefore, it is clear that hierarchy problem is related to fine-tuning problems and the problems of naturalness.
A1: An example please.
Dr. G: A famous Doctor of Alphysics, Doctor Weinberg is a Nobel laureate and measures his authority mass by heavily weighing in his Nobel prize, and therefore he places his absolute position in the hierarchy of Alphysics to be on top, at least nearly on top, maybe just below Einstein. Doctor Weinberg claims that it is an experimental fact that he is a top tier Alphysicist. Doctor Weinberg assumes academic renormalization and counts his Nobel as fine-tuning bonus.
A1: This is an experimental fact if there is any in Alphysics.
Dr. G: But Doctor of Philosophy Doctor Greene has vastly more fame than Doctor Weinberg and Doctor Greene's measurements of his authority shows exceptionally high elegantly fine tuning of fine-tuning terms and furthermore Doctor Greene adds some clever quantum corrections to his status connected to the vacuum oscillations created by his best-seller books in the Amazon spacetimes indicators and creates not only a hierarchy problem but a true hierarchy crisis.
A1: I see. Doctor Weinberg could not agree that his Nobel counts nothing against the elegant tunings of Doctor Greene just because Greene sold more books.
Dr. G: Greene on the other hand claims that Weinberg's Nobel renormalized well when it was new but now it is old news and it has re-depracated beyond re-renormalization. This is the hierarchy problem. It is fascinating science. This is the cutting edge of Alphysics.
Monday, December 18, 2006
Freedom of Science
Admin1: Freedom of Science is the most fundamental human right.
Doctor Gravytee: May be so but humans are not aware of this yet. Since the beginning of history scientific authority always resided with rulers, tyrants, and deities.
A1: A ruler is a human.
Dr. G: Originally all rulers made sure to deify themselves. They were not humans. This is the origin of marketing which is the oldest science.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics are the modern tyrants who obstruct the free flow of information therefore deny humans freedom of Science.
Dr. G: The true authority resides with Newton. Doctors of Alphysics come and go Newton is absolute and immortal.
A1: Newton's Soul is the substance which permeates the entire universe. No wonder he is immortal. Is there a way to free humanity from this religious tyrant?
Dr. G: Yes. Humans must unite and then the rest will come.
A1: That would be the end of Alphysics.
Dr. G: Not at all. We'll change the name of Alphysics to the new science whatever that is. We'll then donate to humanity the day the Big School changed its name as a global holiday and humans will be happy.
Doctor Gravytee: May be so but humans are not aware of this yet. Since the beginning of history scientific authority always resided with rulers, tyrants, and deities.
A1: A ruler is a human.
Dr. G: Originally all rulers made sure to deify themselves. They were not humans. This is the origin of marketing which is the oldest science.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics are the modern tyrants who obstruct the free flow of information therefore deny humans freedom of Science.
Dr. G: The true authority resides with Newton. Doctors of Alphysics come and go Newton is absolute and immortal.
A1: Newton's Soul is the substance which permeates the entire universe. No wonder he is immortal. Is there a way to free humanity from this religious tyrant?
Dr. G: Yes. Humans must unite and then the rest will come.
A1: That would be the end of Alphysics.
Dr. G: Not at all. We'll change the name of Alphysics to the new science whatever that is. We'll then donate to humanity the day the Big School changed its name as a global holiday and humans will be happy.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Thus Spoke the String Theory
Admin1: It seems that for the most famous Doctor of Philosophy Doctor Greene the words Universe and Cosmos are synonyms. The famous Doctor of Alphysics states that “during the last few years there has been tremendous progress in the search for the deepest laws governing the universe." Then he adds that “the next decade will be a formative time and holds the promise of fundamental breakthroughs in our understanding of the cosmos."
Doctor Gravytee: This is true in general for every Doctor of Alphysics who has achieved a certain degree of fame. Once you reach that level of fame you can define any two words to be synonyms at your will.
A1: Is there a difference anyway?
Dr. G: Cosmos is an old word. Cosmos is a defined universe.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Remember the scholastic hoax?
A1: Doctors of Alphysics make a definition and enforce it as the absolute true standard.
Dr. G: Yes. Branding has been the basic method of Scholastic Doctors since the beginning of history.
A1: The most famous Doctor Greene therefore defined a stringy cosmos and has been marketing it as the absolute true universe.
Dr. G: The slick marketing campaign conducted by global publishing houses sponsoring Doctor Greene makes it impossible for people to perceive the cosmogonic declarations of Doctor Greene as comical religious speculations. What is remarkable about the most famous Doctor Greene's statement is that it is boilerplate polemical sophistry used by politicians every day. Just change some words: "During the last few years there has been tremendous progress in our fight against poverty... The next decade will be a formative time and holds the promise of fundamental breakthroughs in our work to eradicate poverty as we know it." The most famous Doctor Greene has mastered the media relations quite well.
A1: Are you saying that Doctor Greene is a synonym for Shaman.
Dr. G: I used to think so. But now I am not so sure. A shaman is supposed to be an authoritative charlatan who entertains his constituency while supplying some useful physic.
A1: What is physic?
Dr. G: Physic is popularized alphysics. Think about snake oil.
A1: Ok. So, Doctor Greene is not even a shaman.
Dr. G: Doctor Greene has crossed over into entertainment and has gone physic. He is an entertainer in 10 dimensions and a shaman only in 1 dimension.
A1: And that dimension where he is a shaman is curled up in a matterless universe?
Dr. G: Thus spoke the String Theory therefore it must be true.
Doctor Gravytee: This is true in general for every Doctor of Alphysics who has achieved a certain degree of fame. Once you reach that level of fame you can define any two words to be synonyms at your will.
A1: Is there a difference anyway?
Dr. G: Cosmos is an old word. Cosmos is a defined universe.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Remember the scholastic hoax?
A1: Doctors of Alphysics make a definition and enforce it as the absolute true standard.
Dr. G: Yes. Branding has been the basic method of Scholastic Doctors since the beginning of history.
A1: The most famous Doctor Greene therefore defined a stringy cosmos and has been marketing it as the absolute true universe.
Dr. G: The slick marketing campaign conducted by global publishing houses sponsoring Doctor Greene makes it impossible for people to perceive the cosmogonic declarations of Doctor Greene as comical religious speculations. What is remarkable about the most famous Doctor Greene's statement is that it is boilerplate polemical sophistry used by politicians every day. Just change some words: "During the last few years there has been tremendous progress in our fight against poverty... The next decade will be a formative time and holds the promise of fundamental breakthroughs in our work to eradicate poverty as we know it." The most famous Doctor Greene has mastered the media relations quite well.
A1: Are you saying that Doctor Greene is a synonym for Shaman.
Dr. G: I used to think so. But now I am not so sure. A shaman is supposed to be an authoritative charlatan who entertains his constituency while supplying some useful physic.
A1: What is physic?
Dr. G: Physic is popularized alphysics. Think about snake oil.
A1: Ok. So, Doctor Greene is not even a shaman.
Dr. G: Doctor Greene has crossed over into entertainment and has gone physic. He is an entertainer in 10 dimensions and a shaman only in 1 dimension.
A1: And that dimension where he is a shaman is curled up in a matterless universe?
Dr. G: Thus spoke the String Theory therefore it must be true.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Is String Theory a Sham or a Hoax?
Admin1: You have called the most elegant theory ever devised by Scholastic Alphysics Doctors to be a Scholastic Sham. Aren't you being a little too elegant yourself by calling such a hoax to be only a sham?
Dr. Gravytee: You are right I am an elegant Alphysics Doctors but you are wrong that I called String Theory merely a Sham. String Theory is a sham which is a Scholastic hoax.
A1: I see. By calling the String Theory a hoax you are emphasizing that Doctors of Alphysics intend to deceive.
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics are delusional fanatics of Newtonian religion.
A1: What does the String Theory have to do with Newtonism.
Dr. G: String theory is the latest version of Newtonist religion. If you look up why Doctors of Alphysics created the String Theory you would see what I mean.
Dr. Gravytee: You are right I am an elegant Alphysics Doctors but you are wrong that I called String Theory merely a Sham. String Theory is a sham which is a Scholastic hoax.
A1: I see. By calling the String Theory a hoax you are emphasizing that Doctors of Alphysics intend to deceive.
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics are delusional fanatics of Newtonian religion.
A1: What does the String Theory have to do with Newtonism.
Dr. G: String theory is the latest version of Newtonist religion. If you look up why Doctors of Alphysics created the String Theory you would see what I mean.
Friday, December 15, 2006
The Invisibility of the Org
Admin1: It is fascinating to realize that we only notice some things only when they start to crumble.
Doctor Gravytee: Traditionally humans experience difficulty to perceive organisms which are too small to perceive with unaided eye and also things which are too big to perceive.
A1: Like bureaucracies?
Dr. G: Yes. Bureaucracies are organisms as real as computer programs or viruses. But humans cannot perceive them.
A1: But we know that there exists something called "the media."
Dr. G: Media is a giant organism. The media exists because they have a protected monopoly on the database of knowledge. This database may be called "news." Giant media own the database and sell it to their customers. They control the channel of distribution as well as the database itself. Gathering of information, creation of database, and the distribution are all controlled by the giant media.
A1: Today citizens have access to the database. We can blog, we can take our news photos...
Dr. G: True. People perceive some kind of change but we have been under the influence of the media so long that we still believe in the standards of the media.
A1: Such as?
Dr. G: The media is a professional industry. Any professional industry is based on authority. In order to add value to their product the media invented a concept of impartial reporting of the news. They pretended to despise conflict of interest. They claimed editorial departments and advertising departments did not know about each other.
A1: Isn't this a good thing?
Dr. G: Not at all. This idiotic notion of impartiality makes sense when the media controls the flow of information. When the information is available for anyone to review the customer no longer cares about the separation of editorial and the advertisements.
A1: Why?
Dr. G: Today, top bloggers still make sure that they disclose for instance that they do not own any shares of a startup they are writing about. Why do I care if they own shares or even if they are paid by the company they are writing about. They are not the only source of information. I could read at least a dozen reviews of a new product in half an hour. If a reviewer is biased and skewed by his association with the company he is reviewing he would lose credibility.
A1: You are saying that the burden lies with the customer not with the professional.
Dr. G: Of course. The professional is free to hype, to exagerate, to lie and to be an evangelist of the product he is trying to sell. It is the customer's duty to decide to believe or not to believe. It is the old way to treat the customer as a baby and as a retarded idiot who cannot tell the hype from an impartial review.
A1: When the media controlled the source of information they sanctified the concept of impartiality in order to gain authority. When they had authority then their customers believed their stories and reviews. Customers had no way of checking the information they had to take the authority of the media because the media claimed fair reporting.
Dr. G: Today we don't need this authority thing anymore. When information is freely available to anybody, the professional better be credible or the customer will simply check the data for himself.
A1: How do all this relate to Alphysics?
Dr. G: Alphysics is a similar kind of con game. The media corresponds to the scholastic hierarchy. The database is alphysics code. The professionals are the alphysic doctors. The customers are the buyers of books and believers who buy into the cosmogonic scenarios of Doctors of Philosophy.
A1: Once we perceive that scholasticism is a real profession, the oldest bureaucracy in existence, and a corporate entity as real as GM or IBM then we see that scholasticism is no different than these companies.
Dr. G: There is no difference. The fact that scholastic corporation does not have a corporate identity in the form of a logo does not make it a non-corporation. For profit corporations at least create value since they produce and sell a product people can use. Doctors of Philosophy who work for the giant scholastic corporation produce nothing useful.
Doctor Gravytee: Traditionally humans experience difficulty to perceive organisms which are too small to perceive with unaided eye and also things which are too big to perceive.
A1: Like bureaucracies?
Dr. G: Yes. Bureaucracies are organisms as real as computer programs or viruses. But humans cannot perceive them.
A1: But we know that there exists something called "the media."
Dr. G: Media is a giant organism. The media exists because they have a protected monopoly on the database of knowledge. This database may be called "news." Giant media own the database and sell it to their customers. They control the channel of distribution as well as the database itself. Gathering of information, creation of database, and the distribution are all controlled by the giant media.
A1: Today citizens have access to the database. We can blog, we can take our news photos...
Dr. G: True. People perceive some kind of change but we have been under the influence of the media so long that we still believe in the standards of the media.
A1: Such as?
Dr. G: The media is a professional industry. Any professional industry is based on authority. In order to add value to their product the media invented a concept of impartial reporting of the news. They pretended to despise conflict of interest. They claimed editorial departments and advertising departments did not know about each other.
A1: Isn't this a good thing?
Dr. G: Not at all. This idiotic notion of impartiality makes sense when the media controls the flow of information. When the information is available for anyone to review the customer no longer cares about the separation of editorial and the advertisements.
A1: Why?
Dr. G: Today, top bloggers still make sure that they disclose for instance that they do not own any shares of a startup they are writing about. Why do I care if they own shares or even if they are paid by the company they are writing about. They are not the only source of information. I could read at least a dozen reviews of a new product in half an hour. If a reviewer is biased and skewed by his association with the company he is reviewing he would lose credibility.
A1: You are saying that the burden lies with the customer not with the professional.
Dr. G: Of course. The professional is free to hype, to exagerate, to lie and to be an evangelist of the product he is trying to sell. It is the customer's duty to decide to believe or not to believe. It is the old way to treat the customer as a baby and as a retarded idiot who cannot tell the hype from an impartial review.
A1: When the media controlled the source of information they sanctified the concept of impartiality in order to gain authority. When they had authority then their customers believed their stories and reviews. Customers had no way of checking the information they had to take the authority of the media because the media claimed fair reporting.
Dr. G: Today we don't need this authority thing anymore. When information is freely available to anybody, the professional better be credible or the customer will simply check the data for himself.
A1: How do all this relate to Alphysics?
Dr. G: Alphysics is a similar kind of con game. The media corresponds to the scholastic hierarchy. The database is alphysics code. The professionals are the alphysic doctors. The customers are the buyers of books and believers who buy into the cosmogonic scenarios of Doctors of Philosophy.
A1: Once we perceive that scholasticism is a real profession, the oldest bureaucracy in existence, and a corporate entity as real as GM or IBM then we see that scholasticism is no different than these companies.
Dr. G: There is no difference. The fact that scholastic corporation does not have a corporate identity in the form of a logo does not make it a non-corporation. For profit corporations at least create value since they produce and sell a product people can use. Doctors of Philosophy who work for the giant scholastic corporation produce nothing useful.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Does String Theory cause lead poisining
Admin1: Union of Concerned Scientists issued a list of examples of political interference in science. Alphysics and its sub-science the String Theory is not listed. This may mean that government does not interfere with Alphysics or Alphysics is not science.
Dr. Gravytee: It may also be that Alphysics is not kind of science worth interfering with. These concerned scientists are concerned about public issues. Alphysics is an elegant theory with absolutely no practical or god forbids proletarian effects. Doctors of Alphysics are arrogantly elegant elitists. This is what sells books. In cosmic and cosmogonic matters public wants authority. We project authority by being arrogantly elegant and elitists. These concerned scientists are concerned about things like lead poisining. None of the spacetimes or backgrounds real or virtual that we use in String Theory cause lead poisoning or that we care to calculated such things.
A1: True. There is no Union of Concerned scientists who are concerned about intellectual string poisoning so you don't have to worry.
Dr. G: String theory is poison only for people who are elegantly impaired. We have nothing to do with them.
Dr. Gravytee: It may also be that Alphysics is not kind of science worth interfering with. These concerned scientists are concerned about public issues. Alphysics is an elegant theory with absolutely no practical or god forbids proletarian effects. Doctors of Alphysics are arrogantly elegant elitists. This is what sells books. In cosmic and cosmogonic matters public wants authority. We project authority by being arrogantly elegant and elitists. These concerned scientists are concerned about things like lead poisining. None of the spacetimes or backgrounds real or virtual that we use in String Theory cause lead poisoning or that we care to calculated such things.
A1: True. There is no Union of Concerned scientists who are concerned about intellectual string poisoning so you don't have to worry.
Dr. G: String theory is poison only for people who are elegantly impaired. We have nothing to do with them.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Scholastic Rip Off
Admin1: Rip Van Winkle awakens in the 21st century after a hundred-year snooze and he is bewildered by what he sees. Women dash about half naked and go aworking for big corporations which did not even exist then. Women and men talk to small metal devices pinned to their ears or they have white strings dangling from their ears. Young people instead of working sit at home on sofas, moving miniature athletes around on electronic screens. Airports, hospitals, shopping malls--every place Rip goes just baffles him. But when he finally walks into a schoolroom, the old man knows exactly where he is. "This is a school," he declares. "We used to have these back in 1906. Only now the blackboards are green."
Doctor Gravytee: Poor old Rip is ignorant of Alphysics. The rate of change of giant bureaucracies is asymptotically close to zero. Scholasticism is one of the oldest and biggest bureaucracies in existence.
A1: I see. Scholasticism transcends national boundaries, it is a protected monopoly, it has no incentive to change. Therefore it does not change. As long it can grow it never changes.
Dr. G: It changes so slowly that it is not even perceptible.
A1: What happens if instead of Rip, Newton woke up from his slumber and came visit us?
Dr. G: Newton would be delighted to see that the religion he established, the Newtonism based on the faith he called Newton's Soul, is stronger than ever. At Newton's death no schools in the new continent taught Newtonism. In the new continent Benjamin Franklin was considered a true scientist not Newton. Newton will be glad to see that the old British colony is now teaching its students the British Newtonist religion as the state religion.
A1: But Newtonism is science not religion.
Dr. G: This is the point. Since Newtonism is taught to you as science when you learned your alphabet you cannot tell that Newtonism is religion. Newton will be so happy to see that his religion is still taught as science.
A1: What happens if Benjamin Franklin came to visit our century?
Dr. G: Benjamin Franklin would be shocked to see that a British religion is being taught to the students of the nation he saved from the British colonization.
A1: Franklin denied the authority of the King of Britain and the authority of the self-declared British King of Mechanics. Now he sees that British colonialists infiltrated the nation at its core. That must be devastating to Benjamin Franklin.
Dr. G: Exactly. Newton wanted to meet the great Benjamin Franklin as if to make him a favor but Franklin could never find the time. Why? Franklin was a free born. He was a citizen not a subject. He could think for himself. He had no need for the authority of the British King or the authority of the British science deity.
A1: This is so true. The reason Benjamin Franklin was able to discover the true laws of electricity was because he denied the authority of the British Newton.
Dr. G: Obviously. But Newton will be happy to see that in alphysics textbook used today in US schools Benjamin Franklin is not mentioned but Newton is mentioned as the god of science taking credit even for the discovery of science of electricity discovered by Franklin.
A1: This cannot be just to Franklin. By teaching the British Newtonist religion to our children we are betraying our heritage. We are betraying the legacy of founding fathers! We are actually teaching our children a 17th century British occult religion instead of science of Benjamin Franklin! Just thinking about this gives me shudders.
Dr. G: That's why Newton is the greatest marketing genius of all times. Newton will see that he was right in every marketing move he made. But Newton is also worried.
A1: Why?
Dr. G: Newton is worried about the Internet. He doesn't like what he sees. Newton is for absolute authority for his disciples who call themselves today physicists. Once citizens have free access to knowledge the authority of the Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy is diluted. The authority of the Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy who call themselves today physicists and cosmologists are based on the fraud that they propagate namely that they know something citizens do not know. Today citizens can easily verify that Doctors of Philosophy are charlatans. They are the latest version of the old shamans except that today they are licensed to practice shamanism when they obtain their license to practice shamanism, the PhD.
A1: Newton's worry is not justified. Internet is already doctored by the Newtonian doctors.
Dr. G: Well. Funny isn't it. Citizens can never win against the Doctors. Citizens are free and independent so they act freely and independently. Doctors act as a group of Newtonist zealots and they are stronger.
A1: We the people already missed one opportunity to get rid of the Doctors when the printing press was invented. Today the Internet is almost lost to Doctors.
Dr. G: Newton will win again.
Doctor Gravytee: Poor old Rip is ignorant of Alphysics. The rate of change of giant bureaucracies is asymptotically close to zero. Scholasticism is one of the oldest and biggest bureaucracies in existence.
A1: I see. Scholasticism transcends national boundaries, it is a protected monopoly, it has no incentive to change. Therefore it does not change. As long it can grow it never changes.
Dr. G: It changes so slowly that it is not even perceptible.
A1: What happens if instead of Rip, Newton woke up from his slumber and came visit us?
Dr. G: Newton would be delighted to see that the religion he established, the Newtonism based on the faith he called Newton's Soul, is stronger than ever. At Newton's death no schools in the new continent taught Newtonism. In the new continent Benjamin Franklin was considered a true scientist not Newton. Newton will be glad to see that the old British colony is now teaching its students the British Newtonist religion as the state religion.
A1: But Newtonism is science not religion.
Dr. G: This is the point. Since Newtonism is taught to you as science when you learned your alphabet you cannot tell that Newtonism is religion. Newton will be so happy to see that his religion is still taught as science.
A1: What happens if Benjamin Franklin came to visit our century?
Dr. G: Benjamin Franklin would be shocked to see that a British religion is being taught to the students of the nation he saved from the British colonization.
A1: Franklin denied the authority of the King of Britain and the authority of the self-declared British King of Mechanics. Now he sees that British colonialists infiltrated the nation at its core. That must be devastating to Benjamin Franklin.
Dr. G: Exactly. Newton wanted to meet the great Benjamin Franklin as if to make him a favor but Franklin could never find the time. Why? Franklin was a free born. He was a citizen not a subject. He could think for himself. He had no need for the authority of the British King or the authority of the British science deity.
A1: This is so true. The reason Benjamin Franklin was able to discover the true laws of electricity was because he denied the authority of the British Newton.
Dr. G: Obviously. But Newton will be happy to see that in alphysics textbook used today in US schools Benjamin Franklin is not mentioned but Newton is mentioned as the god of science taking credit even for the discovery of science of electricity discovered by Franklin.
A1: This cannot be just to Franklin. By teaching the British Newtonist religion to our children we are betraying our heritage. We are betraying the legacy of founding fathers! We are actually teaching our children a 17th century British occult religion instead of science of Benjamin Franklin! Just thinking about this gives me shudders.
Dr. G: That's why Newton is the greatest marketing genius of all times. Newton will see that he was right in every marketing move he made. But Newton is also worried.
A1: Why?
Dr. G: Newton is worried about the Internet. He doesn't like what he sees. Newton is for absolute authority for his disciples who call themselves today physicists. Once citizens have free access to knowledge the authority of the Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy is diluted. The authority of the Newtonian Doctors of Philosophy who call themselves today physicists and cosmologists are based on the fraud that they propagate namely that they know something citizens do not know. Today citizens can easily verify that Doctors of Philosophy are charlatans. They are the latest version of the old shamans except that today they are licensed to practice shamanism when they obtain their license to practice shamanism, the PhD.
A1: Newton's worry is not justified. Internet is already doctored by the Newtonian doctors.
Dr. G: Well. Funny isn't it. Citizens can never win against the Doctors. Citizens are free and independent so they act freely and independently. Doctors act as a group of Newtonist zealots and they are stronger.
A1: We the people already missed one opportunity to get rid of the Doctors when the printing press was invented. Today the Internet is almost lost to Doctors.
Dr. G: Newton will win again.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Who is Afraid of Crackpots
Admin1: Why are Doctors of Alphysics so worried about what they label as crackpots?
Doctor Graytee: Doctors of Alphysics have absolute monopoly on crackpottery. Doctors have no intention of sharing their monopoly in this lucrative field.
A1: But what Doctors labeled crackpot just two years ago now it is mainstream alphysics.
Dr. G: True. This is the internet era. Doctors have been very fast in doctoring the internet. In the last century it took about a decade for science fiction scenarios to appear in peer reviewed alphysics journals as true alphysics. Now most Doctors own blogs and they adapt to the cutting edge of cracpottery faster than ever.
Doctor Graytee: Doctors of Alphysics have absolute monopoly on crackpottery. Doctors have no intention of sharing their monopoly in this lucrative field.
A1: But what Doctors labeled crackpot just two years ago now it is mainstream alphysics.
Dr. G: True. This is the internet era. Doctors have been very fast in doctoring the internet. In the last century it took about a decade for science fiction scenarios to appear in peer reviewed alphysics journals as true alphysics. Now most Doctors own blogs and they adapt to the cutting edge of cracpottery faster than ever.
Monday, December 11, 2006
Experimental by Association
Admin1: Some blogger writes: "We do not need Popper's theories to classify alphysics to be outside science. This is more a legal issue because what alphysicists and cosmologists are doing is fraud."
Doctor Gravytee: There cannot be fraud in an industry which is not regulated. Alphysics is not regulated. Doctors of Alphysics are the jury and the judge.
A1: Doctors define what fraud is.
Dr. G: Sure. We are not going to define fraud as what we do.
A1: In the legal world guilt by association is illegal. In Alphysics experimental by association is legal.
Dr. G: String Theory is an experimental science by association. Cosmology is experimental by association. This is a well established principle in Alphysics.
A1: How does experimental by association work?
Dr. G: Very complicated. You need to know how M-Theory works and what M stands for. But in layman's term, take a database of white noise of some radiation or other, preferably collected by NASA, define it as a cosmic radiation and draw a beautifully colorful computer graphics. Art directors of the New York Times love colorful graphics which fill up a lot of white space between ads and they will publish your computer graphics as the latest experimental verification of the Big Bang. Voila! You have proved the most famous cosmogonic mythology by experimental association.
A1: Alphysics at its best.
Dr. G: Alphysics is an experimental science by association.
Doctor Gravytee: There cannot be fraud in an industry which is not regulated. Alphysics is not regulated. Doctors of Alphysics are the jury and the judge.
A1: Doctors define what fraud is.
Dr. G: Sure. We are not going to define fraud as what we do.
A1: In the legal world guilt by association is illegal. In Alphysics experimental by association is legal.
Dr. G: String Theory is an experimental science by association. Cosmology is experimental by association. This is a well established principle in Alphysics.
A1: How does experimental by association work?
Dr. G: Very complicated. You need to know how M-Theory works and what M stands for. But in layman's term, take a database of white noise of some radiation or other, preferably collected by NASA, define it as a cosmic radiation and draw a beautifully colorful computer graphics. Art directors of the New York Times love colorful graphics which fill up a lot of white space between ads and they will publish your computer graphics as the latest experimental verification of the Big Bang. Voila! You have proved the most famous cosmogonic mythology by experimental association.
A1: Alphysics at its best.
Dr. G: Alphysics is an experimental science by association.
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Hereditary Scientific Authority
Admin1: Doctors of Alphysics got the concept of measurement and its relation to science all wrong.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors measure in impeccable precision what each other know. In this case knowledge refers to the legal code of alphysics usually abbreviated to alphysics. Doctors of Alphysics couldn't care less about the measurement of phenomena.
A1: Really?
Dr. G: Doctors enjoy hereditary scientific authority. This authority gives them unquestioned authority to define what science is. Therefore, they define whatever it is that they think would advance their career the fastest by selling the most books to be science.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics have the hereditary scientific authority to define and what is measured does not matter. They can define the measurement whatever they want it to be.
Dr. G: Exactly. If you have the heridetary authority to define what is measured why measure it in the first place? Why bother to make measurements? The scientific protocol requires that there exists some kind of measurement to save Newton's sacred authority. Newton defined Alphysics to be an experimental science, so we must not change the appearance of practicing an experimental science.
A1: I see. If the measurements of phenomena do not fit their career goals Doctors redefine the measurement to make nature agree with their career goals. This is an old trick of scholasticism. But why Doctors measure so precisely and obsessively each other's knowledge?
Dr. G: The measurement of what your colleagues know is necessary in order to move up in the shcolastic bureaucracy. All through their careers Doctors of Alphysics must pass standardized tests in order to move up on to the next level. As a Doctor moves up the scholastic ladder he earns more authority points. You can tell that a Doctor has arrived, more or less, when he starts to complain loudly about how many Doctoral students he has to supervise and how many requests for reviews he gets. This is all part of accummulating authority points.
A1: But observations show that some Doctors of Alphysics simply rocket through to the top of the hierarchy instead of climbing patiently the scholastic ladder according to the millennia old rules. How come?
Dr. G: The reason for this is usually explained by this formula:
A :: (R + S) * F^2
Clearly a Doctor who has very little rank and seniority but has fame would have the most authority. Rank and seniority being equal, perceived fame gains a Doctor the most authority.
A1: I see. This is why a Doctor, any Doctor, wouldn't hesitate a moment to sell his scientific soul in order to get a quote into the New York Times Science section.
Dr. G: It is a crooked game, yes. It's been dog eat dog in the scholastic business for a long time. Either you have authority or you don't . If you don't have authority you cannot get grants, cannot do research you want, cannot be published in top journals and New York Times won't be calling. Therefore, it is absolutely positively crucial to measure how much authority each Doctor has so that the pecking order is established correctly.
A1: It seems to me that Doctors' crooked ways do not stop with sanctifying the measurement of Doctoral authority and despising real data.
Dr. G: You are mistaking in that. Doctors never say they despise data. Data is sanctified so that the measurement of scholastic authority can be defined as science. You get it?
A1: Doctors defined the measurement of each others' authority to be science?
Dr. G: Just look how much time a Doctor of Alphysics spends on doing measurements of authority.
A1: Are you saying that Doctors of Alphysics turned scholastic arrogance and zealotry into an artform?
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have been blocking the development of human knowledge since the beginning of history. This is our job. This is why we get paid for. It is nothing new. Get used to it.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors measure in impeccable precision what each other know. In this case knowledge refers to the legal code of alphysics usually abbreviated to alphysics. Doctors of Alphysics couldn't care less about the measurement of phenomena.
A1: Really?
Dr. G: Doctors enjoy hereditary scientific authority. This authority gives them unquestioned authority to define what science is. Therefore, they define whatever it is that they think would advance their career the fastest by selling the most books to be science.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics have the hereditary scientific authority to define and what is measured does not matter. They can define the measurement whatever they want it to be.
Dr. G: Exactly. If you have the heridetary authority to define what is measured why measure it in the first place? Why bother to make measurements? The scientific protocol requires that there exists some kind of measurement to save Newton's sacred authority. Newton defined Alphysics to be an experimental science, so we must not change the appearance of practicing an experimental science.
A1: I see. If the measurements of phenomena do not fit their career goals Doctors redefine the measurement to make nature agree with their career goals. This is an old trick of scholasticism. But why Doctors measure so precisely and obsessively each other's knowledge?
Dr. G: The measurement of what your colleagues know is necessary in order to move up in the shcolastic bureaucracy. All through their careers Doctors of Alphysics must pass standardized tests in order to move up on to the next level. As a Doctor moves up the scholastic ladder he earns more authority points. You can tell that a Doctor has arrived, more or less, when he starts to complain loudly about how many Doctoral students he has to supervise and how many requests for reviews he gets. This is all part of accummulating authority points.
A1: But observations show that some Doctors of Alphysics simply rocket through to the top of the hierarchy instead of climbing patiently the scholastic ladder according to the millennia old rules. How come?
Dr. G: The reason for this is usually explained by this formula:
A :: (R + S) * F^2
Clearly a Doctor who has very little rank and seniority but has fame would have the most authority. Rank and seniority being equal, perceived fame gains a Doctor the most authority.
A1: I see. This is why a Doctor, any Doctor, wouldn't hesitate a moment to sell his scientific soul in order to get a quote into the New York Times Science section.
Dr. G: It is a crooked game, yes. It's been dog eat dog in the scholastic business for a long time. Either you have authority or you don't . If you don't have authority you cannot get grants, cannot do research you want, cannot be published in top journals and New York Times won't be calling. Therefore, it is absolutely positively crucial to measure how much authority each Doctor has so that the pecking order is established correctly.
A1: It seems to me that Doctors' crooked ways do not stop with sanctifying the measurement of Doctoral authority and despising real data.
Dr. G: You are mistaking in that. Doctors never say they despise data. Data is sanctified so that the measurement of scholastic authority can be defined as science. You get it?
A1: Doctors defined the measurement of each others' authority to be science?
Dr. G: Just look how much time a Doctor of Alphysics spends on doing measurements of authority.
A1: Are you saying that Doctors of Alphysics turned scholastic arrogance and zealotry into an artform?
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have been blocking the development of human knowledge since the beginning of history. This is our job. This is why we get paid for. It is nothing new. Get used to it.
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Cosmic Guacamole
Admin1: A woman in California filed suit against Kraft Foods, Inc., claiming that the company commits fraud by calling a dip product guacamole.
Doctor Gravytee: I hope that the news does not get around. As long as the media presents it as yet another curiousity from California we should be OK.
A1: Alphysics connection is obvious isn't it? The woman is very logical. She says that the main ingredient in guacamole is avacoda. Kraft Foods sells a product as guacamole which does not contain avocado. Therefore, this logical woman reasons that what Kraft Foods sells as guacamole is not guacamole.
Dr. G: This poor woman obviously has no awareness of how science works.
A1: You mean how alphysics works.
Dr. G: Alphysics is science.
A1: The giant unhuman corporation which ironically calls itself Kraft "Foods" was concerned enough to change the labeling in their guacamole which is not guacomole.
Dr. G: To what?
A1: They'll change the label to read "avocado-flavored guacamole."
Dr. G: That's a dangerous compromise! What's next? Someone will sue Alphysics Doctors because there is no science ingredient in our cosmogonical scenarios and string theory enchilada? What nonsense!
A1: No problem. You will just change your label: "String Theory: Best Science-flavored scenario ever. Dip your curiosity in our rich science flavor made with plenty of artificial cosmogonic colorings and number mysticism, scholastic sophistry and metaphysical polemics."
Dr. G: String Theory is now at revolution number XXX and it has 10 per cent more improved science flavor in it.
A1: Are you going to add some experimental flavor in the next revolution?
Dr. G: You bet.
Doctor Gravytee: I hope that the news does not get around. As long as the media presents it as yet another curiousity from California we should be OK.
A1: Alphysics connection is obvious isn't it? The woman is very logical. She says that the main ingredient in guacamole is avacoda. Kraft Foods sells a product as guacamole which does not contain avocado. Therefore, this logical woman reasons that what Kraft Foods sells as guacamole is not guacamole.
Dr. G: This poor woman obviously has no awareness of how science works.
A1: You mean how alphysics works.
Dr. G: Alphysics is science.
A1: The giant unhuman corporation which ironically calls itself Kraft "Foods" was concerned enough to change the labeling in their guacamole which is not guacomole.
Dr. G: To what?
A1: They'll change the label to read "avocado-flavored guacamole."
Dr. G: That's a dangerous compromise! What's next? Someone will sue Alphysics Doctors because there is no science ingredient in our cosmogonical scenarios and string theory enchilada? What nonsense!
A1: No problem. You will just change your label: "String Theory: Best Science-flavored scenario ever. Dip your curiosity in our rich science flavor made with plenty of artificial cosmogonic colorings and number mysticism, scholastic sophistry and metaphysical polemics."
Dr. G: String Theory is now at revolution number XXX and it has 10 per cent more improved science flavor in it.
A1: Are you going to add some experimental flavor in the next revolution?
Dr. G: You bet.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
The Greene Religion
Admin1: Your predictions are coming true, the most famous Doctor of Philosophy Doctor Greene has turned himself into a movie star.
Doctor Gravytee: String theory predicts that if it can be special effected then it is predicted by String Theory and it gets the stamp of approval of the most famous Doctor Greene.
A1: Why is this religion?
Doctor Gravytee: In the millennia old turf wars between Doctors of Philosophy and Doctors of Theology who are fighting to save the souls of the same innocent people to fatten their stomachs and pockets each group of Doctors claims to represent the true authority and insults his counterpart as being an ignorant and unfaithful moron with a defective authority to support his far fetched cosmogonic claims. Doctor Greene will never get tired of comparing creationism and the String Theory. This is what his constituency wants to hear.
A1: We know this from politics.
Doctor G: Yes, politicians are also professionals who use the same trick on their constituency.
A1: So are you saying that both standard religions of Doctors of Theology and the alphysical religion evangelicized by the Most Famous Doctor Greene are religions?
Dr. G: Exactly. Doctors themselves created this duality which does not exist. Most famous Doctor Greene the String Theory evangelist claims that creationism is religion but String Theory is science.
A1: This sounds right. The most rigorous String Theory is based on absolutely true and rigorous mathematicism and makes exact predictions in the form of special effects which are then experimentally proved by Doctor Greene who successfully reenacts them in his movies. Creationism on the other hand is based on the authority of a book written in a dead language two thousand years ago by sandal wearing peasants who never heard of special effects and therefore did not know about science and believed in not reproducible special effects such as people coming out of their graves three days later still smelling myrrh.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony is religion. The claimed authority for cosmogonic speculations is not relevant. Whatever authority Doctors claim to sell their cosmogonic scenarios their cosmogonic scenarios are still cosmogonic scenarios sold as religion.
A1: I see. If it is cosmogony it is religion. It doesn't matter what authority Doctors use to support their cosmogonic lies.
Dr. G: Each cosmogonic religion is fraud. To substantiate their fraud so that they can sell more books Professional Doctors need an authority that people will trust.
A1: This makes sense. Two thousand years ago for the illiterate Mediterranean peasants the written word was the authority. If the Word said that the dead was raised from the dead they believed it. They never heard of mathematical String Theory which predicts raising of the dead by time travel.
Dr. G: True. For today's illiterate citizens the mathematics is the absolute authority. This is why they believe the String Theory and the scientific claims of dead routinely raised by Doctor Greene during his travels in various spacetimes.
A1: Doctors of Philosophy are so clever that they keep raising the illiteracy bar. As their constituency wise up and learn about their obscurantist tricks Doctors make the language of authority more and more complicated and proprietary and hidden so that they can define their constituency as illiterates. People finally learned to read but now they are defined by Doctors as mathematically illiterate.
Dr. G: It is amazing how such a simple fraud still works. Not much changed in two thousand years.
A1: Except the medium in which the Doctors screw their constituency.
Dr. G: Yes. Doctors of Alphysics are pretty much controlling the Internet and they are transitioning to the movies.
A1: Nothing surprising here. Doctors of Alphysics have been writing scenarios for the last 75 years or so. It is about time that they turned those scenarios into movies.
Dr. G: Doctors are now defining the popular culture and they are hip. The most famous Doctor Greene, the new face of modern religion for the masses, knows that today fiction becomes truth only when it is fictionalized in a movie.
A1: Another String Theory revolution cannot be far off.
Dr. G: Who knew that the M in M-Theory stood for the Media.
A1: That explains all.
Dr. G: True. The M-Theory is the Theory of Everything and the Media explains it all.
Doctor Gravytee: String theory predicts that if it can be special effected then it is predicted by String Theory and it gets the stamp of approval of the most famous Doctor Greene.
A1: Why is this religion?
Doctor Gravytee: In the millennia old turf wars between Doctors of Philosophy and Doctors of Theology who are fighting to save the souls of the same innocent people to fatten their stomachs and pockets each group of Doctors claims to represent the true authority and insults his counterpart as being an ignorant and unfaithful moron with a defective authority to support his far fetched cosmogonic claims. Doctor Greene will never get tired of comparing creationism and the String Theory. This is what his constituency wants to hear.
A1: We know this from politics.
Doctor G: Yes, politicians are also professionals who use the same trick on their constituency.
A1: So are you saying that both standard religions of Doctors of Theology and the alphysical religion evangelicized by the Most Famous Doctor Greene are religions?
Dr. G: Exactly. Doctors themselves created this duality which does not exist. Most famous Doctor Greene the String Theory evangelist claims that creationism is religion but String Theory is science.
A1: This sounds right. The most rigorous String Theory is based on absolutely true and rigorous mathematicism and makes exact predictions in the form of special effects which are then experimentally proved by Doctor Greene who successfully reenacts them in his movies. Creationism on the other hand is based on the authority of a book written in a dead language two thousand years ago by sandal wearing peasants who never heard of special effects and therefore did not know about science and believed in not reproducible special effects such as people coming out of their graves three days later still smelling myrrh.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony is religion. The claimed authority for cosmogonic speculations is not relevant. Whatever authority Doctors claim to sell their cosmogonic scenarios their cosmogonic scenarios are still cosmogonic scenarios sold as religion.
A1: I see. If it is cosmogony it is religion. It doesn't matter what authority Doctors use to support their cosmogonic lies.
Dr. G: Each cosmogonic religion is fraud. To substantiate their fraud so that they can sell more books Professional Doctors need an authority that people will trust.
A1: This makes sense. Two thousand years ago for the illiterate Mediterranean peasants the written word was the authority. If the Word said that the dead was raised from the dead they believed it. They never heard of mathematical String Theory which predicts raising of the dead by time travel.
Dr. G: True. For today's illiterate citizens the mathematics is the absolute authority. This is why they believe the String Theory and the scientific claims of dead routinely raised by Doctor Greene during his travels in various spacetimes.
A1: Doctors of Philosophy are so clever that they keep raising the illiteracy bar. As their constituency wise up and learn about their obscurantist tricks Doctors make the language of authority more and more complicated and proprietary and hidden so that they can define their constituency as illiterates. People finally learned to read but now they are defined by Doctors as mathematically illiterate.
Dr. G: It is amazing how such a simple fraud still works. Not much changed in two thousand years.
A1: Except the medium in which the Doctors screw their constituency.
Dr. G: Yes. Doctors of Alphysics are pretty much controlling the Internet and they are transitioning to the movies.
A1: Nothing surprising here. Doctors of Alphysics have been writing scenarios for the last 75 years or so. It is about time that they turned those scenarios into movies.
Dr. G: Doctors are now defining the popular culture and they are hip. The most famous Doctor Greene, the new face of modern religion for the masses, knows that today fiction becomes truth only when it is fictionalized in a movie.
A1: Another String Theory revolution cannot be far off.
Dr. G: Who knew that the M in M-Theory stood for the Media.
A1: That explains all.
Dr. G: True. The M-Theory is the Theory of Everything and the Media explains it all.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Hidden assumptions
Admin1: Freeman Dyson has a new book: The Scientist as Rebel.
Doctor Gravytee: Dyson's total misunderstanding of Newton distinguishes him as one of the important alphysicists of our time. In his latest book Dyson argues that the best way to understand science is by understanding those who practice it. He tells stories of scientists at work, ranging from Isaac Newton's absorption in physics, alchemy, theology, and politics to Ernest Rutherford's discovery of the structure of the atom.
A1: The number of hidden assumptions in this sentence is more than usual even for an alphysicist.
Dr. G: Well, yes, Dyson is a famous alphysicist. The more famous an alphysicist is the more hidden assumptions he can cram in a sentence.
A1: He calls Newton a scientist.
Dr. G: Not only that he makes Newton practice physics. The word physics was invented in the 19th century because the general population was realizing that people who called themselves natural philosophers in honor of Newton's book's title were nothing other than the same scholastic Doctors who have been praying on human reason for millennia.
A1: Newton did not know what physics was.
Dr. G: Rutherford's discovery of structure of atom??
A1: Why? You don't believe Rutherford discovered the structure of atom?
Dr. G: Yes of course. He did in the mythology of alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Dyson's total misunderstanding of Newton distinguishes him as one of the important alphysicists of our time. In his latest book Dyson argues that the best way to understand science is by understanding those who practice it. He tells stories of scientists at work, ranging from Isaac Newton's absorption in physics, alchemy, theology, and politics to Ernest Rutherford's discovery of the structure of the atom.
A1: The number of hidden assumptions in this sentence is more than usual even for an alphysicist.
Dr. G: Well, yes, Dyson is a famous alphysicist. The more famous an alphysicist is the more hidden assumptions he can cram in a sentence.
A1: He calls Newton a scientist.
Dr. G: Not only that he makes Newton practice physics. The word physics was invented in the 19th century because the general population was realizing that people who called themselves natural philosophers in honor of Newton's book's title were nothing other than the same scholastic Doctors who have been praying on human reason for millennia.
A1: Newton did not know what physics was.
Dr. G: Rutherford's discovery of structure of atom??
A1: Why? You don't believe Rutherford discovered the structure of atom?
Dr. G: Yes of course. He did in the mythology of alphysics.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
How do Woit, Greene and Motl rate in Baez' crackpot index
Admin1: According to Baez' famous crackpot index you get "50 points for claiming you have a revolutionary theory but giving no concrete testable predictions." Are famous string theorists crackpots?
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. In Alphysics String theory is a acutely revolutionary theory since it revolutionizes itself every two years. All the predictions we make are testable. It is a minor detail that they are testable in uncommon universes of 11 dimensions that alphysicists will create in colliders that is being built by NASA beyond solar system by the Pioneer space craft. Once that collider is inaugurated it will prove all the testable predictions the String Theory makes.
A1: When?
Dr. G: NASA and General Dynamics, the contractor, is predicting ontime delivery on November 12, 2106 at 19:44:11pm.
A1: So precise. This is incredible. One hundred years from now to the second the String Theory will be verified exactly as you say now.
Dr. G: Correct.
A1: This is so exciting!! It will be a first since the universe started that NASA and one of its contractors will deliver a project on time. This shadows any experimental proof of String Theory. If they can deliver a collider beyond the solar system built by a decommissioned spacecraft on time there will be no doubt that the universe is as elegant as predicted by Doctor Greene.
Dr. G: Yes the most famous Doctor Greene will inaugurate the extra-solar system by traveling throught spacetime in one of the time machines that Doctor Baez and his students are building right now.
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. In Alphysics String theory is a acutely revolutionary theory since it revolutionizes itself every two years. All the predictions we make are testable. It is a minor detail that they are testable in uncommon universes of 11 dimensions that alphysicists will create in colliders that is being built by NASA beyond solar system by the Pioneer space craft. Once that collider is inaugurated it will prove all the testable predictions the String Theory makes.
A1: When?
Dr. G: NASA and General Dynamics, the contractor, is predicting ontime delivery on November 12, 2106 at 19:44:11pm.
A1: So precise. This is incredible. One hundred years from now to the second the String Theory will be verified exactly as you say now.
Dr. G: Correct.
A1: This is so exciting!! It will be a first since the universe started that NASA and one of its contractors will deliver a project on time. This shadows any experimental proof of String Theory. If they can deliver a collider beyond the solar system built by a decommissioned spacecraft on time there will be no doubt that the universe is as elegant as predicted by Doctor Greene.
Dr. G: Yes the most famous Doctor Greene will inaugurate the extra-solar system by traveling throught spacetime in one of the time machines that Doctor Baez and his students are building right now.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Doctoring Internet
Admin1: Is the web being doctored?
Doctor Gravytee: Sure. Web made people access information traditionally controlled by Doctors of Alphysics.
A1: Doctors were in danger of losing their monopoly on human reason.
Dr. G: No such danger. Web has been doctored already. At this point Doctors control the web already.
A1: I don't think so.
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have momentum. They will protect their territory. No longer will their traditional proprietary information be freely available in the Internet.
Doctor Gravytee: Sure. Web made people access information traditionally controlled by Doctors of Alphysics.
A1: Doctors were in danger of losing their monopoly on human reason.
Dr. G: No such danger. Web has been doctored already. At this point Doctors control the web already.
A1: I don't think so.
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have momentum. They will protect their territory. No longer will their traditional proprietary information be freely available in the Internet.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Mathematical polemics
Admin1: Doctors of Alphysics Latinized mathematics.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors of Alphysics made science social science. Mathematics is their Latin.
A1: Now I see. It was only yesterday teaching of Latin was glorified as the fundamental source of knowledge. Mathematics replaced Latin as the source of knowledge. Then Doctors of Alphysics turned mathematics into social science.
Doctor Gravytee: You need to be careful. You may be insulting Doctors of Alphysics. Social Science is science whether it is social or not. Alphysics is not science and it will never be.
A1: How do you define mathematics in Alphysics?
Dr. G: Mathematics in Alphysics is a word which starts with M therefore it is extremely well defined and well-known.
A1: You mean it is undefined like M-Theory.
Dr. G: M-Theory is not undefined. You are missing the important but subtle detail. Mathematics is multiply defined.
A1: Mathematics means whatever Doctors of Alphysics want it to mean.
Dr. G: Exactly.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors of Alphysics made science social science. Mathematics is their Latin.
A1: Now I see. It was only yesterday teaching of Latin was glorified as the fundamental source of knowledge. Mathematics replaced Latin as the source of knowledge. Then Doctors of Alphysics turned mathematics into social science.
Doctor Gravytee: You need to be careful. You may be insulting Doctors of Alphysics. Social Science is science whether it is social or not. Alphysics is not science and it will never be.
A1: How do you define mathematics in Alphysics?
Dr. G: Mathematics in Alphysics is a word which starts with M therefore it is extremely well defined and well-known.
A1: You mean it is undefined like M-Theory.
Dr. G: M-Theory is not undefined. You are missing the important but subtle detail. Mathematics is multiply defined.
A1: Mathematics means whatever Doctors of Alphysics want it to mean.
Dr. G: Exactly.
Calculus Cobol
Admin1: Is teaching Calculus today is like teaching Cobol as the cutting edge programming language today?
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. What is called mathematics and calculus has been taken over by computer languages. When calculus was invented it was like a computer language. It allowed people to calculate tangents easily.
A1: Then why teach a dead language?
Dr. G: You need to understand the dynamics of bureaucracies. Alphysics is an immense bureaucracy. Once a department in a bureaucracy has been established it will never ever go away. Calculus is taught out of habit not because it is useful in anyway.
A1: Latin disappeared.
Dr. G: Latin has never disappeared. It changed its name to calculus.
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. What is called mathematics and calculus has been taken over by computer languages. When calculus was invented it was like a computer language. It allowed people to calculate tangents easily.
A1: Then why teach a dead language?
Dr. G: You need to understand the dynamics of bureaucracies. Alphysics is an immense bureaucracy. Once a department in a bureaucracy has been established it will never ever go away. Calculus is taught out of habit not because it is useful in anyway.
A1: Latin disappeared.
Dr. G: Latin has never disappeared. It changed its name to calculus.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Wrong is Cool
Admin1: I love the synergy between the media and Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Media is our best friend.
Admin1: We know that Alphysics is part of the entertainment/publishing complex but I didn't know that Alphysics belonged to the fringes of entertainment at the level of what used to be called the burlesque:
Cosmologists know there is something seriously wrong with the standard Big Bang cosmological model. The magnitude of the cosmological constant—a mathematical representation of the energy of empty space—predicted by this theory differs from the measured value by a factor of 10120.
Dr. G: This quote is typical Alphysics. There is not one single meaningful statement in this quote. This statement is not even wrong in terms of punctuation.
A1: You mean it is so wrong that it is not even grammatically wrong.
Dr. G: Yes. "Mathematical representation of the energy of empty space!" This is sad stuff.
A1: I cannot stop laughing. I am sorry. The predicted value of the cosmological constant differs by the measured value by gigantic factor...
Dr. G: Funny stuff. The writer is a good Alphysics reporter. The average reader would say "Wow, look at the difference between the theoretical and the measured value," and be awed for a moment and continue to the sports section. But the punchline is the word "measured." Measured value of "cosmological constant?" What a joke! Now you see why Alphysics is so entertaining.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
The String theory of the previous generation
Admin1: Is Alphysics made of String Theory alone?
Doctor Gravytee: Fifty years ago when Einstein's General Relativity entered academia Alphysicists of the time were as hip as String theorists of today. Today General Relativity is a textbook fare. Doctors of Alphysics proved General Relativity so well and so many times that they cannot get enough of it and they are still proving it. It is easier to prove experimentally theories which are recognized by NSF as good theories to prove. There will be a Doctor of Alphysics proving Einstein's General Theory of Relativity as long as NSF doles out grants for experimental proofs of General Relativity.
Doctor Gravytee: Fifty years ago when Einstein's General Relativity entered academia Alphysicists of the time were as hip as String theorists of today. Today General Relativity is a textbook fare. Doctors of Alphysics proved General Relativity so well and so many times that they cannot get enough of it and they are still proving it. It is easier to prove experimentally theories which are recognized by NSF as good theories to prove. There will be a Doctor of Alphysics proving Einstein's General Theory of Relativity as long as NSF doles out grants for experimental proofs of General Relativity.
Friday, October 13, 2006
Revolutions in Alphysics
Admin1: What does Revolution mean in Alphysics?
Doctor Gravytee: String Theory fully conforms to the modern consumer society.
A1: String Theory is always 100% *NEW* and *IMPROVED*.
Dr. G: Previously cosmogonical speculations such as Newton's laws were designed to be around for centuries. Generations of humans consumed the same cosmogonical speculation and were happy with it. In our fast-paced consumer society we throw away a perfectly good jacket after using it a few times and buy a new one. The same behavior is reflected in cosmogonical fashions as well. String Theory is designed to change every academic season.
A1: String revolutions are then just marketing of new and improved versions of the theory?
Dr. G: Exactly. "5% more Experimental" is a standard slogan in String Theory packaging. Experiment, like M-Theory, is a secret ingredient of the String Theory. Every season the theory gets more experimental by making testable predictions in farther and farther away in time. String theory experimentally predicts when the Big Crunch will happen to one-hundredth of a second. Since the Big Cruch will happen in the 11th dimension this also proves the existence of 11 dimensions.
A1: What happens to millions of pre-revolutionary papers written by Alphysicists when a new revolution is announced?
Dr. G: With the possibilities of new media Doctors of Alphysics output so much String Theory wisdom that every season they discard the accumulated junk and start over and call this process a revolution.
Doctor Gravytee: String Theory fully conforms to the modern consumer society.
A1: String Theory is always 100% *NEW* and *IMPROVED*.
Dr. G: Previously cosmogonical speculations such as Newton's laws were designed to be around for centuries. Generations of humans consumed the same cosmogonical speculation and were happy with it. In our fast-paced consumer society we throw away a perfectly good jacket after using it a few times and buy a new one. The same behavior is reflected in cosmogonical fashions as well. String Theory is designed to change every academic season.
A1: String revolutions are then just marketing of new and improved versions of the theory?
Dr. G: Exactly. "5% more Experimental" is a standard slogan in String Theory packaging. Experiment, like M-Theory, is a secret ingredient of the String Theory. Every season the theory gets more experimental by making testable predictions in farther and farther away in time. String theory experimentally predicts when the Big Crunch will happen to one-hundredth of a second. Since the Big Cruch will happen in the 11th dimension this also proves the existence of 11 dimensions.
A1: What happens to millions of pre-revolutionary papers written by Alphysicists when a new revolution is announced?
Dr. G: With the possibilities of new media Doctors of Alphysics output so much String Theory wisdom that every season they discard the accumulated junk and start over and call this process a revolution.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Marketing, Alphysics and String Theory
Admin1: Top three labels are Doctors of Alphysics, Marketing and String Theory.
Doctor Gravytee: How does the String Theory reach general public?
A1: Through popular books.
Dr. G: That is marketing. What is the subject of String Theory?
A1: It is cosmogony.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony means the chase of ultimates. Whether it is the ultimate smallest or the ultimate farthest or the ultimate container, String Theory has all the answers.
A1: As far as I know String Theory revolutionized Alphysics by revolutionizing itself every three years.
Dr. G: The revolution of the String Theory lies in its nothingness. String Theory explains nothing. It has been known to Doctors of Alphysics for millennia that the most ultimate answers are empty vessels. Today's Doctors reinvented the empty vessel of their ancestors in the most elegantly existential theory ever devised by Alphysicists. The Ultimate Unknown the M theory explains all. This is pure elegance.
Doctor Gravytee: How does the String Theory reach general public?
A1: Through popular books.
Dr. G: That is marketing. What is the subject of String Theory?
A1: It is cosmogony.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony means the chase of ultimates. Whether it is the ultimate smallest or the ultimate farthest or the ultimate container, String Theory has all the answers.
A1: As far as I know String Theory revolutionized Alphysics by revolutionizing itself every three years.
Dr. G: The revolution of the String Theory lies in its nothingness. String Theory explains nothing. It has been known to Doctors of Alphysics for millennia that the most ultimate answers are empty vessels. Today's Doctors reinvented the empty vessel of their ancestors in the most elegantly existential theory ever devised by Alphysicists. The Ultimate Unknown the M theory explains all. This is pure elegance.
Monday, October 09, 2006
The separation of data from its display
Admin1: XML documents do not carry information about how to display data.
Dr. Gravytee: This is very unelegant and it won't be acceptable in Alphysics circles.
A1: Single XML tags are invented by the author of the XML document, browsers do not know if a tag like *table* describes an HTML table or a dining table.
Dr. G: In Alphysics a word *word* describes any word defined by the Doctor in that namespace.
A1: This is confusing. String Theory does not conform to namespace.
Dr. G: *namespace* is a word. Therefore, in Alphysics *namespace* means whatever I say it means now. Few minutes later I will use *namespace* to mean its opposite.
A1: So in Alphysics *table* means a dining table and an HTML table.
Dr. G: Centuries ago, when mathematics was a new topic and Doctors were inventing its rules displaying mathematics was through geometry. Today mathematical displays are pictorial.
A1: Therefore, in Alphysics mathematical displays are not mathematical but pictorial and polemical.
Dr. G: Surely. Nature spared us from the ubiquitous photoshop ball stretching the fabric of spacetimes. Such a thing does not exist in nature. Both spacetimes and its fabric and the photoshop ball are elegant branding.
A1: Very Confucian.
Dr. G: Confucius fought hard against the Doctors of Alphysics of his time to rectify the language so that table meant table but he did not succeed. After Confucius many have tried. They all failed. In the 17th century Fermat tried to rectify geometry in order to remove all the scholastic and Alphysical layers of junk Doctors added on geometrical figures in order to corrupt geometry so that they can use the authority of geometry to further their careers. Fermat too failed.
Dr. Gravytee: This is very unelegant and it won't be acceptable in Alphysics circles.
A1: Single XML tags are invented by the author of the XML document, browsers do not know if a tag like *table* describes an HTML table or a dining table.
Dr. G: In Alphysics a word *word* describes any word defined by the Doctor in that namespace.
A1: This is confusing. String Theory does not conform to namespace.
Dr. G: *namespace* is a word. Therefore, in Alphysics *namespace* means whatever I say it means now. Few minutes later I will use *namespace* to mean its opposite.
A1: So in Alphysics *table* means a dining table and an HTML table.
Dr. G: Centuries ago, when mathematics was a new topic and Doctors were inventing its rules displaying mathematics was through geometry. Today mathematical displays are pictorial.
A1: Therefore, in Alphysics mathematical displays are not mathematical but pictorial and polemical.
Dr. G: Surely. Nature spared us from the ubiquitous photoshop ball stretching the fabric of spacetimes. Such a thing does not exist in nature. Both spacetimes and its fabric and the photoshop ball are elegant branding.
A1: Very Confucian.
Dr. G: Confucius fought hard against the Doctors of Alphysics of his time to rectify the language so that table meant table but he did not succeed. After Confucius many have tried. They all failed. In the 17th century Fermat tried to rectify geometry in order to remove all the scholastic and Alphysical layers of junk Doctors added on geometrical figures in order to corrupt geometry so that they can use the authority of geometry to further their careers. Fermat too failed.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Scholastic Berlin Walls
Admin1: In today's society there are Berlin walls separating parts of knowledge. These boundaries are artificial. Nature is one. The boundaries are invented by Professional Doctors to protect their careers and the investment they made to themselves. These boundaries are good for Doctors' well being but they are not good for human well-being. Therefore, by pulling down these scholastic Berlin Walls dividing human knowledge into artificial parts the human progress will be helped. The origin of hording knowledge goes back to European peasant, the human squirrel.
Doctor Gravytee: Correct.
Doctor Gravytee: Correct.
Is science science
Admin1: In the list we have only two humans mentioned.
Doctor Gravytee: Not true. Remember Alphysics is marketing. In marketing we create an exact replica of the human and mythologize the replica. In rational systems this cannot be done. If you try to name two files on your desktop with the same name you would get an error message. Windows is a rational system. Two items with the same name would not make sense to a rational system. In Alphysics the more synonyms the better.
A1: In reality there are two Newtons and two Doctors Greene. One mythological and one human.
Dr. G: Yes. Alphysics uses the mythological Doctor Greene.
A1: Mythology is secular religion. So I should put Newton and Doctor Greene under religion?
Dr. G: Yes, in theory. But remember we don't want to use old and tired words. Religion is an old and tired word with an image problem. Alphysics is science. So create a category called science and put Alphysics and String Theory under that category.
A1: Will do.
Doctor Gravytee: Not true. Remember Alphysics is marketing. In marketing we create an exact replica of the human and mythologize the replica. In rational systems this cannot be done. If you try to name two files on your desktop with the same name you would get an error message. Windows is a rational system. Two items with the same name would not make sense to a rational system. In Alphysics the more synonyms the better.
A1: In reality there are two Newtons and two Doctors Greene. One mythological and one human.
Dr. G: Yes. Alphysics uses the mythological Doctor Greene.
A1: Mythology is secular religion. So I should put Newton and Doctor Greene under religion?
Dr. G: Yes, in theory. But remember we don't want to use old and tired words. Religion is an old and tired word with an image problem. Alphysics is science. So create a category called science and put Alphysics and String Theory under that category.
A1: Will do.
Derivation
Admin1: I updated the label list.
Doctor Gravytee: You did well with the list except that you failed.
A1: Thank you.
Dr. G: I noticed that you removed the synonyms.
A1: Yes.
Dr. G: What for? Synonyms are where Alphysics is. How can you remove them. You need to add more synonyms so that we can start doing Alphysics.
A1: I am learning.
Dr. G: In rational systems which are not yet achieved the supreme abzurd state of Alphysics synonyms are seen as errors. In a rational list language you would write synonyms on the same line. They are equivalent. They are definitions. It doesn't matter if you call Doctor Greene Doctor Greene Mr. Greene, Greene, or use his Columbia employee ID number to identify him. But in non-rational systems such as Alphysics we define as many synonyms as possible and we write them on separate lines to create an illusion of hierarchy.
A1: I see. This way derivation becomes possible.
Dr. G: Yes. You are a fast learner. If you write synonyms as synonyms there would be no papers to write because synonyms are synonyms. If you order the synonyms as if they were different entities and then cancel them by derivation to obtain the root element you could write several papers.
A1: Isn't this a waste of time? Why write all those superfluous synonyms in order to cancel them?
Dr. G: Derivation is a Very Old Scholastic Polemics. It is glorious. Derivation is synonymous with Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: You did well with the list except that you failed.
A1: Thank you.
Dr. G: I noticed that you removed the synonyms.
A1: Yes.
Dr. G: What for? Synonyms are where Alphysics is. How can you remove them. You need to add more synonyms so that we can start doing Alphysics.
A1: I am learning.
Dr. G: In rational systems which are not yet achieved the supreme abzurd state of Alphysics synonyms are seen as errors. In a rational list language you would write synonyms on the same line. They are equivalent. They are definitions. It doesn't matter if you call Doctor Greene Doctor Greene Mr. Greene, Greene, or use his Columbia employee ID number to identify him. But in non-rational systems such as Alphysics we define as many synonyms as possible and we write them on separate lines to create an illusion of hierarchy.
A1: I see. This way derivation becomes possible.
Dr. G: Yes. You are a fast learner. If you write synonyms as synonyms there would be no papers to write because synonyms are synonyms. If you order the synonyms as if they were different entities and then cancel them by derivation to obtain the root element you could write several papers.
A1: Isn't this a waste of time? Why write all those superfluous synonyms in order to cancel them?
Dr. G: Derivation is a Very Old Scholastic Polemics. It is glorious. Derivation is synonymous with Alphysics.
String Theory is here to stay
Admin1: Do you have a grudge against String Theory?
Doctor Gravytee: Regardless of the recent books against it the String Theory is strong and well. String Theory is here to stay. Now there are more Doctors of Philosophy of the Strings than all the other Doctors of Philosophy combined.
A1: But why does the String Theory exist? Is it here to replace Alphysics?
Dr. G: String Theory is a manifestation of Alphysics. String Theory is the buzzword we use to sell books.
A1: Is there another reason besides selling books why String Theory exists?
Dr. G: There is the official party line and then there is the true reason. The official party line is that two different nebulous monstors created by Alphysicists are found to be incompatible by their creators. Alphysicists have been trying to reconcile these two abzurd by producing more extreme abzurd. String Theory has been chosen by the publishing industry as the best profitable of the many competing Alphysics scenarios. The publishing industry has chosen Doctor Greene as the spokesperson of this modern religion as science.
A1: And what is the true reason?
Dr. G: The true reason why String Theory exists is because Newton existed.
Doctor Gravytee: Regardless of the recent books against it the String Theory is strong and well. String Theory is here to stay. Now there are more Doctors of Philosophy of the Strings than all the other Doctors of Philosophy combined.
A1: But why does the String Theory exist? Is it here to replace Alphysics?
Dr. G: String Theory is a manifestation of Alphysics. String Theory is the buzzword we use to sell books.
A1: Is there another reason besides selling books why String Theory exists?
Dr. G: There is the official party line and then there is the true reason. The official party line is that two different nebulous monstors created by Alphysicists are found to be incompatible by their creators. Alphysicists have been trying to reconcile these two abzurd by producing more extreme abzurd. String Theory has been chosen by the publishing industry as the best profitable of the many competing Alphysics scenarios. The publishing industry has chosen Doctor Greene as the spokesperson of this modern religion as science.
A1: And what is the true reason?
Dr. G: The true reason why String Theory exists is because Newton existed.
Is Alphysics legal
Admin1: What Latin is to Law Mathematics is to Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. In Alphysics we use
- specialized words and phrases unique or nearly unique to Alphysics, such as, "it is easy to prove that..." and "it is well known that...." "we have proved in our previous paper that..."
- everyday English words that when used in Alphysics have different meanings from everyday usage, such as action, string, force, to know, everything, zero, one, equal to... the list goes on and on. We actively and explicitly corrupt the English language and we are very proud of it.
- archaic vocabulary. Alphysics employs a fairly large number of outdated words and phrases that were formerly part of everyday English but are today rare except in Alphysics. Most of them date from the 17th century. Most are long abandoned outside Alphysics. The entirety of almathematics can be cited as example of archaic vocabulary.
- loan words and phrases from other languages: in this category are terms derived from German and the mechanism in German of combining words to make a new word, most famous example of which is the spacetime.
A1: There is a need for Plain English movement in Alphysics too.
Dr. G: There is no such need. Archaism is an essential ingredient of Alphysics. Legalese is bad but Alphysics is twice as bad as legalese but we market our brand so well that Alphysics stands for Science.
A1: Alphysics = Legalese?
Dr. G: No. Alphysics = 2Legalese. Legal professionals are totally ignorant of marketing. They think marketing is bad and they do not protect their brand. We use the legalistic archaic obscurantism we call Alphysics to obtain six-figure book contracts in order to explain what we obscure.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Bugs are features of the Theory
Admin1: Then, what is mathematics?
Dr. Gravytee: Mathematics is the XML of the 17th century.
A1: Or was.
Dr. G: Yes. Was. Today's mathematics has no error that is why mathematics is so bloated.
A1: Alphysics is doubly bloated.
Dr. G: In XML the program does not continue to process when it finds an error. But with HTML it is possible to create documents with lots of errors. This is the reason why HTML browsers are so bloated and why they are so incompatible. Each browser has its own way of figuring out what a document should look like when it encounters an HTML error.
A1: Wow! It's like, I mean, browsers are Doctors of Alphysics!
Dr. G: In Alphysics each Doctor of Alphysics has his own way of defining his own favorite Universe. And each of these Universes are based on an error in mathematics.
A1: For example, division by zero became the famous black hole!
Dr. G: You see why Doctors of Alphysics will never give up their authority over mathematics. If and when Doctors of Alphysics give up their authority over mathematics and, say, chose XML as their professional language they will no longer be able to invent absurdities based on linguistic abuse and sell them as true science in bestselling books.
A1: That's a scary thought. But it will never happen.
Dr. G: True. It will never happen. Once a bureaucracy is created, and in this case it is a lucrative bureaucracy feeding the giant entertainment industry, it will never go away. Never.
A1: But it will change its name.
Dr. G: Yes.
Dr. Gravytee: Mathematics is the XML of the 17th century.
A1: Or was.
Dr. G: Yes. Was. Today's mathematics has no error that is why mathematics is so bloated.
A1: Alphysics is doubly bloated.
Dr. G: In XML the program does not continue to process when it finds an error. But with HTML it is possible to create documents with lots of errors. This is the reason why HTML browsers are so bloated and why they are so incompatible. Each browser has its own way of figuring out what a document should look like when it encounters an HTML error.
A1: Wow! It's like, I mean, browsers are Doctors of Alphysics!
Dr. G: In Alphysics each Doctor of Alphysics has his own way of defining his own favorite Universe. And each of these Universes are based on an error in mathematics.
A1: For example, division by zero became the famous black hole!
Dr. G: You see why Doctors of Alphysics will never give up their authority over mathematics. If and when Doctors of Alphysics give up their authority over mathematics and, say, chose XML as their professional language they will no longer be able to invent absurdities based on linguistic abuse and sell them as true science in bestselling books.
A1: That's a scary thought. But it will never happen.
Dr. G: True. It will never happen. Once a bureaucracy is created, and in this case it is a lucrative bureaucracy feeding the giant entertainment industry, it will never go away. Never.
A1: But it will change its name.
Dr. G: Yes.
Friday, October 06, 2006
Alphysics by Association
Admin1: To claim to have measured the radiation from the mythological origin of the cosmos seems like another example of Scholastic Sham.
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. It is a good example of Alphysics by Association.
A1: I see. It is like experimental String Theory.
Dr. G: Of course. In Alphysics, more specifically in String Theory, the experimenter measures the period of the moving part of a gadget. He then associates his measurement with an absurd claim made by the String Theorist.
A1: When Alphysics will become a regulated industry such behavior will be non-compliant.
Dr. G: Alphysics will not be regulated.
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. It is a good example of Alphysics by Association.
A1: I see. It is like experimental String Theory.
Dr. G: Of course. In Alphysics, more specifically in String Theory, the experimenter measures the period of the moving part of a gadget. He then associates his measurement with an absurd claim made by the String Theorist.
A1: When Alphysics will become a regulated industry such behavior will be non-compliant.
Dr. G: Alphysics will not be regulated.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
White noise analysis yields Nobel Prize
Admin1: Congratulations! Two alphysicists won the Nobel Prize.
Doctory Gravytee: They are not true Alphysicists. Everyone wants to be alphysicists. Alphysics is glamorous. Database analysis is not glamorous.
A1: They are awarded the Nobel Alphysics for this year. And cosmogony and cosmology are well-established alphysical subjects.
Dr. G: Alphysicists have been inventing defined cosmoses for millennia. These Nobel Laureates are really number crunchers. Their profession is data reduction not alphysics. Alphysics is an elegant science. No alphysicist would work for NASA.
A1: I see. There are three different fields: Cosmogony, database analysis and Alphysics.
Dr. G: These three are irreconcilably disconnected. For political reasons NASA must have a "scientific payload." They need to justify their budget. This has been the tradition. It is curious that NASA considers cosmogony science.
A1: But the Nobel Laureates measured the radiation predicted by the Big Bang theory.
Dr. G: Really? The most distinguished Nobel Laureates measured local white noise. They obtained an immense database made of white noise. They analyzed this white noise and drew a media pleasing attractive map. They never measured anything else.
Doctory Gravytee: They are not true Alphysicists. Everyone wants to be alphysicists. Alphysics is glamorous. Database analysis is not glamorous.
A1: They are awarded the Nobel Alphysics for this year. And cosmogony and cosmology are well-established alphysical subjects.
Dr. G: Alphysicists have been inventing defined cosmoses for millennia. These Nobel Laureates are really number crunchers. Their profession is data reduction not alphysics. Alphysics is an elegant science. No alphysicist would work for NASA.
A1: I see. There are three different fields: Cosmogony, database analysis and Alphysics.
Dr. G: These three are irreconcilably disconnected. For political reasons NASA must have a "scientific payload." They need to justify their budget. This has been the tradition. It is curious that NASA considers cosmogony science.
A1: But the Nobel Laureates measured the radiation predicted by the Big Bang theory.
Dr. G: Really? The most distinguished Nobel Laureates measured local white noise. They obtained an immense database made of white noise. They analyzed this white noise and drew a media pleasing attractive map. They never measured anything else.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Elitist obscurantism
Admin1: Why is the String Theory so crucial in human understanding of nature?
Doctor Gravytee: It is not. String Theory is an elitist obscurantism who markets the absurd as the true science.
A1: In other words, String Theory is the modern name of scholasticism.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes. Scholasticism has acquired a bad reputation so we had to rename it to something more marketable.
Doctor Gravytee: It is not. String Theory is an elitist obscurantism who markets the absurd as the true science.
A1: In other words, String Theory is the modern name of scholasticism.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes. Scholasticism has acquired a bad reputation so we had to rename it to something more marketable.
Monday, October 02, 2006
Marketing Alphysics
Admin1: Clicking the "Marketing" label under Labels pulls up three of your greatest posts: The Equality Symbol, Not Even Wrong, and The Hierarchy.
Doctor Gravytee: Marketing drives Alphysics. Not Even Wrong is a Very Scholastic Old Polemics. The Third Truth is loved by Doctors of any kind. And every generation discovers it anew and gives it a new label and sells more books.
A1: Do you equate Marketing to polemics?
Dr. G: The equality sign is a dangerous polemical tool. It has absolute authority. Since it defines the sentence of the language used by Doctors of Alphysics, the almathematics, therefore, it has tremendous authority. Most people cannot even look at a sentence which contains some symbols arranged on either side of an equality sign. They are so scared of such a monster.
A1: The Hierarchy?
Dr. G: The Hierarchy is marketing too. Doctors of Alphysics use the strict hierarchical structure of their industry as proof of its absolute authority.
A1: Alphysics lies in the fringes of the giant entertainment industry therefore it is inevitable that it is driven by marketing.
Dr. G: Nature is written in the language of marketing.
Doctor Gravytee: Marketing drives Alphysics. Not Even Wrong is a Very Scholastic Old Polemics. The Third Truth is loved by Doctors of any kind. And every generation discovers it anew and gives it a new label and sells more books.
A1: Do you equate Marketing to polemics?
Dr. G: The equality sign is a dangerous polemical tool. It has absolute authority. Since it defines the sentence of the language used by Doctors of Alphysics, the almathematics, therefore, it has tremendous authority. Most people cannot even look at a sentence which contains some symbols arranged on either side of an equality sign. They are so scared of such a monster.
A1: The Hierarchy?
Dr. G: The Hierarchy is marketing too. Doctors of Alphysics use the strict hierarchical structure of their industry as proof of its absolute authority.
A1: Alphysics lies in the fringes of the giant entertainment industry therefore it is inevitable that it is driven by marketing.
Dr. G: Nature is written in the language of marketing.
Sunday, October 01, 2006
The greatest genius ever lived
Admin1: According to a new study Newton has been rated the greatest genius ever lived?
Doctor Gravytee: Newton was indeed a genius.
A1: What kind of proof do you have for that?
Dr. G: Newton discovered gravity.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Newton defined the laws of the universe.
A1: Are you talking about the so-called Newton's laws?
Dr. G: Yes. Newton's laws are still valid even if we need to modify them here and there a little bit.
A1: You don't think there is a Newton myth.
Dr. G: There is a Newton myth. And rightly so. Newton's genius is beyond any mortal's comprehension.
A1: But Newton did not know about the String Theory. Newton did not know about Einstein's theory of General Relativity. It seems that since he failed to discover such elegant theories of nature he cannot be such a huge genius.
Dr. G: There is no measure of genius. Newton established the modern field of science today we call Alphysics. He is the founding father of Alphysics. To recognize this fact Doctors of Alphysics defined the fundamental unit of Alphysics to be Newton.
A1: Have you read Newton's Principia?
Dr. G: No. What for?
A1: But Newton's Principia is the greatest scientific book ever written.
Dr. G: No doubt about that.
A1: Is it also the fundamental book of Alphysics?
Dr. G: It is. But most Doctors of Alphysics do not know this fact.
Doctor Gravytee: Newton was indeed a genius.
A1: What kind of proof do you have for that?
Dr. G: Newton discovered gravity.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Newton defined the laws of the universe.
A1: Are you talking about the so-called Newton's laws?
Dr. G: Yes. Newton's laws are still valid even if we need to modify them here and there a little bit.
A1: You don't think there is a Newton myth.
Dr. G: There is a Newton myth. And rightly so. Newton's genius is beyond any mortal's comprehension.
A1: But Newton did not know about the String Theory. Newton did not know about Einstein's theory of General Relativity. It seems that since he failed to discover such elegant theories of nature he cannot be such a huge genius.
Dr. G: There is no measure of genius. Newton established the modern field of science today we call Alphysics. He is the founding father of Alphysics. To recognize this fact Doctors of Alphysics defined the fundamental unit of Alphysics to be Newton.
A1: Have you read Newton's Principia?
Dr. G: No. What for?
A1: But Newton's Principia is the greatest scientific book ever written.
Dr. G: No doubt about that.
A1: Is it also the fundamental book of Alphysics?
Dr. G: It is. But most Doctors of Alphysics do not know this fact.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
The equality symbol
Admin1: Therefore, in simple and definite terms, whatever is written in what Doctors of Alphysics call "mathematics" can be translated into common language we call English without any loss of meaning or precision.
Doctor Gravytee: This is not true at all. You can never translate any mathematical statement into English.
A1: Really?
Dr. G: Really. Statements of the kind of mathematics used by Doctors of Alphysics have multiple meanings. If you try to translate any mathematical statement into English you would end up with multiple contradictory sentences for every mathematical statement of the Doctors.
A1: So actually mathematical statements are not precise.
Dr. G: Not at all. How can a mathematical statement be precise if its fundamental symbol, the equality symbol, has at least 7 meanings.
A1: But Doctors of Alphysics claim that their mathematics is so precise that it is the only scientific language.
Dr. G: This is true. Each one of the every contradictory mathematical statements is precisely true in their own spacetime, in their own universe and in the university of the Doctor of Alphysics.
A1: Outside its proper domain then mathematical statements are only speculations.
Dr. G: More than speculations. They are speculative scenarios of extreme precision.
A1: This is very entertaining.
Dr. G: Alphysics is entertainment.
A1: I thought Alphysics was marketing.
Dr. G: Alphysics is what Doctors of Alphysics say it is.
A1: Precisely?
Dr. G: Very precisely.
Doctor Gravytee: This is not true at all. You can never translate any mathematical statement into English.
A1: Really?
Dr. G: Really. Statements of the kind of mathematics used by Doctors of Alphysics have multiple meanings. If you try to translate any mathematical statement into English you would end up with multiple contradictory sentences for every mathematical statement of the Doctors.
A1: So actually mathematical statements are not precise.
Dr. G: Not at all. How can a mathematical statement be precise if its fundamental symbol, the equality symbol, has at least 7 meanings.
A1: But Doctors of Alphysics claim that their mathematics is so precise that it is the only scientific language.
Dr. G: This is true. Each one of the every contradictory mathematical statements is precisely true in their own spacetime, in their own universe and in the university of the Doctor of Alphysics.
A1: Outside its proper domain then mathematical statements are only speculations.
Dr. G: More than speculations. They are speculative scenarios of extreme precision.
A1: This is very entertaining.
Dr. G: Alphysics is entertainment.
A1: I thought Alphysics was marketing.
Dr. G: Alphysics is what Doctors of Alphysics say it is.
A1: Precisely?
Dr. G: Very precisely.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Almathematics
Admin1: Is there a one to one relation between what Doctors of Alphysics call "mathematics" and the English language?
Doctor Gravytee: Your question is an important one. Remember that Doctors of Alphysics use mathematics as authority. This is a well established tradition. What Doctors of Alphysics call mathematics is not something that non-Doctors of Alphysics can understand. This is by definition.
A1: I don't understand. Not only there is no possibility of translation between what Doctors of Alphysics call mathematics and the English language but by definition Doctors of Alphysics are the official translators of the language of mathematics into English.
Dr. G: Yes. You don't understand. Mathematics is a hidden language which is revealed only to Doctors of Alphysics. Mathematics is a language which is by definition not available to non Doctors.
A1: Buy why does this language called mathematics has such a powerful authority on human reason?
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have created the propaganda that only what they call mathematics can reveal the truth about nature.
A1: This is strange. Doctors of Alphysics have made no new discoveries about nature for two millennia.
Dr. G: This is how the society works.
Doctor Gravytee: Your question is an important one. Remember that Doctors of Alphysics use mathematics as authority. This is a well established tradition. What Doctors of Alphysics call mathematics is not something that non-Doctors of Alphysics can understand. This is by definition.
A1: I don't understand. Not only there is no possibility of translation between what Doctors of Alphysics call mathematics and the English language but by definition Doctors of Alphysics are the official translators of the language of mathematics into English.
Dr. G: Yes. You don't understand. Mathematics is a hidden language which is revealed only to Doctors of Alphysics. Mathematics is a language which is by definition not available to non Doctors.
A1: Buy why does this language called mathematics has such a powerful authority on human reason?
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have created the propaganda that only what they call mathematics can reveal the truth about nature.
A1: This is strange. Doctors of Alphysics have made no new discoveries about nature for two millennia.
Dr. G: This is how the society works.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Not even not wrong
Admin1: For every Doctor of Alphysics who says that the String Theory is true there is an equal number of Doctors of Alphysics who say that the String Theory is wrong. And there is another equal number of Doctors of Alphysics who say that String Theory is not even wrong.
Doctor Gravytee: True indeed. In Alphysics hundred per cent need to add up to hundred per cent.
A1: More importantly what is to be gained by criticizing such an Elegant Theory as the String Theory?
Dr. G: What is more important than selling books? The more controversy there is the more books are sold. So the Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene and the Lesser Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Woit hail from the same famous center of Alphysics, Columbia University. Both write books. Both books sell more because of the apparent controversy created by apparently conflicting views.
A1: Great Alphysical debate. Either way String Theory wins
Dr. G: String theory will be overthrown in due time in fifty years by the next generation. This is the natural cycle of theories in Alphysics.
A1: So it doesn't really matter if String Theory is right or wrong?
Dr. G: String Theory is neither right nor wrong neither it is not even wrong not and not even not even wrong not. String Theory fulfills a real necessity in our society. String Theory is a religion. People want the Doctors of Alphysics define for them the cosmic grid telling them "you are here." There is no reason to criticize Doctors of Alphysics for authoritatively defining this grid for the general population.
Doctor Gravytee: True indeed. In Alphysics hundred per cent need to add up to hundred per cent.
A1: More importantly what is to be gained by criticizing such an Elegant Theory as the String Theory?
Dr. G: What is more important than selling books? The more controversy there is the more books are sold. So the Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene and the Lesser Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Woit hail from the same famous center of Alphysics, Columbia University. Both write books. Both books sell more because of the apparent controversy created by apparently conflicting views.
A1: Great Alphysical debate. Either way String Theory wins
Dr. G: String theory will be overthrown in due time in fifty years by the next generation. This is the natural cycle of theories in Alphysics.
A1: So it doesn't really matter if String Theory is right or wrong?
Dr. G: String Theory is neither right nor wrong neither it is not even wrong not and not even not even wrong not. String Theory fulfills a real necessity in our society. String Theory is a religion. People want the Doctors of Alphysics define for them the cosmic grid telling them "you are here." There is no reason to criticize Doctors of Alphysics for authoritatively defining this grid for the general population.
The Hierarchy
Admin1: Modern Alphysics is more hierarchical than any period since its founding by Newton.
Dr. Gravytee: Not really. Alphysics has always being about hierarchy. But previous generations of Doctors have been more careful in keeping the hierarchy invisible to the general public. Fame seeking Doctors of today found out that they gain easy fame by popularizing The Theory. With more exposure comes more scrutiny and more visibility.
A1: The Alphysical authority is tied to the number of books Doctors can sell.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes and No. Everyone who wants to understand modern Alphysics must watch the NOVA movie which was first aired in 2003. In that movie you would clearly see the strict hierarchical structure of the Alphysics industry.
A1: What I saw most in the NOVA movie was the most famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene being the star of countless special effects. The line separating the ridiculous and string theory is indeed a fine one.
Dr. G: The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene is the spokesperson and the face of Alphysics. For marketing reasons we cannot make the Highly Esteemed Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Inverted M to be the face of the profession. NOVA movie is really a recruiting propaganda so The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene has done a good job going through all the cliches of special effects.
A1: Are you saying that the Most Esteemed Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Inverted M Witten is really the ultimate authority?
Dr. G: Yes and No. First notice that The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene has the most exposure. But Doctor Greene reports to Doctor Inverted M who only is seen walking mysteriously in Princeton where Einstein also walked. Do you get the connection?
A1: The way The Ultimately Most Famous Crippled Doctor Hawking occupies the old wheelchair of Newton in Cambridge, The Most Esteemed Doctor Inverted M occupies Einstein's walking paths in New Jersey. This is genius by association.
Dr. G: In the NOVA movie you see that The Most Famous Doctor Greene personifies the Elegance that is String Theory. Then not so photogenic Doctor inverted M is seen walking in the woods of Princeton where Einstein walked to suggest that He is the Top Genius by association. Therefore, by Stringy logic, Einstein, Witten and Greene are all cosmic class geniuses. And then you see the poor rank and file genius of Alphysics who are allowed only to utter one sentence hyping the string theory. And note, very important, the rank and file are filmed in their office but to emphasize their low level in the hierarchy they are all superimposed on the same corny background with blinking lights. Do you get it?
A1: Yes. I think I do. They don't even get to walk the paths of wisdom in Princeton and they are not involved with any special effects. But this String Theory must be an Alphysical force to be reckoned with. Some of the so called rank and file are Nobel Laureates.
Dr. G: Indeed. Nobel laureates of previous generations know nothing about string theory. They don't even understand it. That's why they just want to ride the wave of String Theory and get quoted in NOVA so that they can promote their own books.
A1: This is all so fascinating from a marketing point of view. What does it have to do with Alphysics?
Dr. G: You got it! Alphysics is Marketing!
Dr. Gravytee: Not really. Alphysics has always being about hierarchy. But previous generations of Doctors have been more careful in keeping the hierarchy invisible to the general public. Fame seeking Doctors of today found out that they gain easy fame by popularizing The Theory. With more exposure comes more scrutiny and more visibility.
A1: The Alphysical authority is tied to the number of books Doctors can sell.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes and No. Everyone who wants to understand modern Alphysics must watch the NOVA movie which was first aired in 2003. In that movie you would clearly see the strict hierarchical structure of the Alphysics industry.
A1: What I saw most in the NOVA movie was the most famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene being the star of countless special effects. The line separating the ridiculous and string theory is indeed a fine one.
Dr. G: The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene is the spokesperson and the face of Alphysics. For marketing reasons we cannot make the Highly Esteemed Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Inverted M to be the face of the profession. NOVA movie is really a recruiting propaganda so The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene has done a good job going through all the cliches of special effects.
A1: Are you saying that the Most Esteemed Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Inverted M Witten is really the ultimate authority?
Dr. G: Yes and No. First notice that The Most Famous Doctor of Alphysics Doctor Greene has the most exposure. But Doctor Greene reports to Doctor Inverted M who only is seen walking mysteriously in Princeton where Einstein also walked. Do you get the connection?
A1: The way The Ultimately Most Famous Crippled Doctor Hawking occupies the old wheelchair of Newton in Cambridge, The Most Esteemed Doctor Inverted M occupies Einstein's walking paths in New Jersey. This is genius by association.
Dr. G: In the NOVA movie you see that The Most Famous Doctor Greene personifies the Elegance that is String Theory. Then not so photogenic Doctor inverted M is seen walking in the woods of Princeton where Einstein walked to suggest that He is the Top Genius by association. Therefore, by Stringy logic, Einstein, Witten and Greene are all cosmic class geniuses. And then you see the poor rank and file genius of Alphysics who are allowed only to utter one sentence hyping the string theory. And note, very important, the rank and file are filmed in their office but to emphasize their low level in the hierarchy they are all superimposed on the same corny background with blinking lights. Do you get it?
A1: Yes. I think I do. They don't even get to walk the paths of wisdom in Princeton and they are not involved with any special effects. But this String Theory must be an Alphysical force to be reckoned with. Some of the so called rank and file are Nobel Laureates.
Dr. G: Indeed. Nobel laureates of previous generations know nothing about string theory. They don't even understand it. That's why they just want to ride the wave of String Theory and get quoted in NOVA so that they can promote their own books.
A1: This is all so fascinating from a marketing point of view. What does it have to do with Alphysics?
Dr. G: You got it! Alphysics is Marketing!
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Principles
Admin1: What is mathematics and what is its relation to the String Theory?
Doctor Gravytee: Good question. According to the M Principle of the String Theory no word starting with M can have any meaning that can be known by Doctors of Alphysics. So if you ask a Doctor of Alphysics What does M in M-Theory stand for? he would reply that M stands for Matrix, Mystery, inverted W and all of the above and none of the above and Multiples of all of the none of the above. Therefore, mathematics is elegantly mysterious in String Theory.
A1: This M Principle is more powerful than all the other principles of Alphysics combined.
Dr. G: Yes. The Cosmological Principle, Mach Principle, Einstein's Equivalence Principle, Lorentz Principle, Witten Principle, Greene Principle... the list goes on and on. M Principle unifies all the previous principles of Alphysics.
A1: Wouldn't be nice to have a Principle to stop Doctors of Alphysics from inventing any more principles?
Dr. G: No. Alphysics is an experimental science.
Doctor Gravytee: Good question. According to the M Principle of the String Theory no word starting with M can have any meaning that can be known by Doctors of Alphysics. So if you ask a Doctor of Alphysics What does M in M-Theory stand for? he would reply that M stands for Matrix, Mystery, inverted W and all of the above and none of the above and Multiples of all of the none of the above. Therefore, mathematics is elegantly mysterious in String Theory.
A1: This M Principle is more powerful than all the other principles of Alphysics combined.
Dr. G: Yes. The Cosmological Principle, Mach Principle, Einstein's Equivalence Principle, Lorentz Principle, Witten Principle, Greene Principle... the list goes on and on. M Principle unifies all the previous principles of Alphysics.
A1: Wouldn't be nice to have a Principle to stop Doctors of Alphysics from inventing any more principles?
Dr. G: No. Alphysics is an experimental science.
Scholastic sham
Admin1: Not only ants crawling on visual illusionistic light poles but coffee cups and doughnuts have elegant significance in human understanding of the elegant universe.
Doctor Gravytee: Since a coffee cup and a doughnut have the same shape therefore the universe is elegant and the string theory is correct and 11 dimensions exists.
A1: Is this what you call the scholastic sham?
Dr. G: This is stringy logic. The six figure book contracts exist therefore string theory is right, wrong and not even wrong.
Doctor Gravytee: Since a coffee cup and a doughnut have the same shape therefore the universe is elegant and the string theory is correct and 11 dimensions exists.
A1: Is this what you call the scholastic sham?
Dr. G: This is stringy logic. The six figure book contracts exist therefore string theory is right, wrong and not even wrong.
Monday, September 25, 2006
Stringy logic
Admin1: The incomprehensibly elegant mathematicism of the The Theory predicts that we are living in a universe in which visual illusions exist.
Doctor Gravytee: The Theory has predicted to the Doctors of Alphysics that visual illusion is a reality. Therefore, when you look at a New York City traffic light pole you notice that the metal wires securing the red, yellow and green lights are flat. As you zoom closer and closer with a powerful camera you then notice dazed ants crawling on the metal wires. The incredible discovery that Doctors of Alphysics have made is that the metal wires holding New York City light poles are actually three dimensional and not two dimensional.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics spend at least two decades cramming Alphysics in their academic dens. When Doctors of Alphysics are not cramming Alphysics they relax by watching Star Wars and Saturday Morning Cartoons. No wonder they are totally unaware that metal poles are three dimensional.
Dr. G: Yes. Doctors of Alphysics live in a cartoon universe and not surprisingly the universe they defined is a cartoon universe where special effects are believed to be real. Of course, Doctors of Alphysics do not name their universe Saturday Morning Cartoons Universe, they call their universe Einstein-DeSitter Universe, which sounds better don't you think.
A1: Therefore, Doctors of Alphysics used the most elegant mathematicism of The Theory and realized that The Theory predicted that we are living in a universe so elegant that visual illusions exist. And since visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist.
Dr. G: This is one of the most elegantly striking stringy logic ever used by Doctors.
A1: Just to clarify. It is the elegant mathematicism of The Theory which told Doctors that visual illusions exist, right?
Dr. G: Yes, indeed. Doctors of Alphysics are using the simple illustration of ants crawling on New York City light posts to illustrate to low grade humanity who are not familiar with the Stringy logic the elegant mathematicism. Civilians otherwise would not be able to comprehend this stringy logic.
A1: I see. The existence of visual illusions is proved by the elegantine mathematicism of the most stringy kind. And without it humanity would never have known that visual illusions existed.
Dr. G: The simple is incomprehensible to Doctors of Alphysics. But super ugly elegantine mathematicism Doctors of Alphysics use to express the simple statement "visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist" makes elegant sense to them.
A1: In the Nova movie the elegantinely stringy mathematicism of the theory is written on the blackboard with chalk. The result of such a nostalgic activity cannot be wrong. While a simple statement such as "visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist" has no meaning without the elegantine mathematicism of The Theory.
Dr. G: Without knowing the stringy mathematicism you cannot understand the deep and elegant symbolism of ants crawling on New York City light posts.
Doctor Gravytee: The Theory has predicted to the Doctors of Alphysics that visual illusion is a reality. Therefore, when you look at a New York City traffic light pole you notice that the metal wires securing the red, yellow and green lights are flat. As you zoom closer and closer with a powerful camera you then notice dazed ants crawling on the metal wires. The incredible discovery that Doctors of Alphysics have made is that the metal wires holding New York City light poles are actually three dimensional and not two dimensional.
A1: Doctors of Alphysics spend at least two decades cramming Alphysics in their academic dens. When Doctors of Alphysics are not cramming Alphysics they relax by watching Star Wars and Saturday Morning Cartoons. No wonder they are totally unaware that metal poles are three dimensional.
Dr. G: Yes. Doctors of Alphysics live in a cartoon universe and not surprisingly the universe they defined is a cartoon universe where special effects are believed to be real. Of course, Doctors of Alphysics do not name their universe Saturday Morning Cartoons Universe, they call their universe Einstein-DeSitter Universe, which sounds better don't you think.
A1: Therefore, Doctors of Alphysics used the most elegant mathematicism of The Theory and realized that The Theory predicted that we are living in a universe so elegant that visual illusions exist. And since visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist.
Dr. G: This is one of the most elegantly striking stringy logic ever used by Doctors.
A1: Just to clarify. It is the elegant mathematicism of The Theory which told Doctors that visual illusions exist, right?
Dr. G: Yes, indeed. Doctors of Alphysics are using the simple illustration of ants crawling on New York City light posts to illustrate to low grade humanity who are not familiar with the Stringy logic the elegant mathematicism. Civilians otherwise would not be able to comprehend this stringy logic.
A1: I see. The existence of visual illusions is proved by the elegantine mathematicism of the most stringy kind. And without it humanity would never have known that visual illusions existed.
Dr. G: The simple is incomprehensible to Doctors of Alphysics. But super ugly elegantine mathematicism Doctors of Alphysics use to express the simple statement "visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist" makes elegant sense to them.
A1: In the Nova movie the elegantinely stringy mathematicism of the theory is written on the blackboard with chalk. The result of such a nostalgic activity cannot be wrong. While a simple statement such as "visual illusions exist therefore 11 dimensions exist" has no meaning without the elegantine mathematicism of The Theory.
Dr. G: Without knowing the stringy mathematicism you cannot understand the deep and elegant symbolism of ants crawling on New York City light posts.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)