Admin1: Is the web being doctored?
Doctor Gravytee: Sure. Web made people access information traditionally controlled by Doctors of Alphysics.
A1: Doctors were in danger of losing their monopoly on human reason.
Dr. G: No such danger. Web has been doctored already. At this point Doctors control the web already.
A1: I don't think so.
Dr. G: Doctors of Alphysics have momentum. They will protect their territory. No longer will their traditional proprietary information be freely available in the Internet.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Mathematical polemics
Admin1: Doctors of Alphysics Latinized mathematics.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors of Alphysics made science social science. Mathematics is their Latin.
A1: Now I see. It was only yesterday teaching of Latin was glorified as the fundamental source of knowledge. Mathematics replaced Latin as the source of knowledge. Then Doctors of Alphysics turned mathematics into social science.
Doctor Gravytee: You need to be careful. You may be insulting Doctors of Alphysics. Social Science is science whether it is social or not. Alphysics is not science and it will never be.
A1: How do you define mathematics in Alphysics?
Dr. G: Mathematics in Alphysics is a word which starts with M therefore it is extremely well defined and well-known.
A1: You mean it is undefined like M-Theory.
Dr. G: M-Theory is not undefined. You are missing the important but subtle detail. Mathematics is multiply defined.
A1: Mathematics means whatever Doctors of Alphysics want it to mean.
Dr. G: Exactly.
Doctor Gravytee: Doctors of Alphysics made science social science. Mathematics is their Latin.
A1: Now I see. It was only yesterday teaching of Latin was glorified as the fundamental source of knowledge. Mathematics replaced Latin as the source of knowledge. Then Doctors of Alphysics turned mathematics into social science.
Doctor Gravytee: You need to be careful. You may be insulting Doctors of Alphysics. Social Science is science whether it is social or not. Alphysics is not science and it will never be.
A1: How do you define mathematics in Alphysics?
Dr. G: Mathematics in Alphysics is a word which starts with M therefore it is extremely well defined and well-known.
A1: You mean it is undefined like M-Theory.
Dr. G: M-Theory is not undefined. You are missing the important but subtle detail. Mathematics is multiply defined.
A1: Mathematics means whatever Doctors of Alphysics want it to mean.
Dr. G: Exactly.
Calculus Cobol
Admin1: Is teaching Calculus today is like teaching Cobol as the cutting edge programming language today?
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. What is called mathematics and calculus has been taken over by computer languages. When calculus was invented it was like a computer language. It allowed people to calculate tangents easily.
A1: Then why teach a dead language?
Dr. G: You need to understand the dynamics of bureaucracies. Alphysics is an immense bureaucracy. Once a department in a bureaucracy has been established it will never ever go away. Calculus is taught out of habit not because it is useful in anyway.
A1: Latin disappeared.
Dr. G: Latin has never disappeared. It changed its name to calculus.
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. What is called mathematics and calculus has been taken over by computer languages. When calculus was invented it was like a computer language. It allowed people to calculate tangents easily.
A1: Then why teach a dead language?
Dr. G: You need to understand the dynamics of bureaucracies. Alphysics is an immense bureaucracy. Once a department in a bureaucracy has been established it will never ever go away. Calculus is taught out of habit not because it is useful in anyway.
A1: Latin disappeared.
Dr. G: Latin has never disappeared. It changed its name to calculus.
Monday, October 16, 2006
Wrong is Cool
Admin1: I love the synergy between the media and Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Media is our best friend.
Admin1: We know that Alphysics is part of the entertainment/publishing complex but I didn't know that Alphysics belonged to the fringes of entertainment at the level of what used to be called the burlesque:
Cosmologists know there is something seriously wrong with the standard Big Bang cosmological model. The magnitude of the cosmological constant—a mathematical representation of the energy of empty space—predicted by this theory differs from the measured value by a factor of 10120.
Dr. G: This quote is typical Alphysics. There is not one single meaningful statement in this quote. This statement is not even wrong in terms of punctuation.
A1: You mean it is so wrong that it is not even grammatically wrong.
Dr. G: Yes. "Mathematical representation of the energy of empty space!" This is sad stuff.
A1: I cannot stop laughing. I am sorry. The predicted value of the cosmological constant differs by the measured value by gigantic factor...
Dr. G: Funny stuff. The writer is a good Alphysics reporter. The average reader would say "Wow, look at the difference between the theoretical and the measured value," and be awed for a moment and continue to the sports section. But the punchline is the word "measured." Measured value of "cosmological constant?" What a joke! Now you see why Alphysics is so entertaining.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
The String theory of the previous generation
Admin1: Is Alphysics made of String Theory alone?
Doctor Gravytee: Fifty years ago when Einstein's General Relativity entered academia Alphysicists of the time were as hip as String theorists of today. Today General Relativity is a textbook fare. Doctors of Alphysics proved General Relativity so well and so many times that they cannot get enough of it and they are still proving it. It is easier to prove experimentally theories which are recognized by NSF as good theories to prove. There will be a Doctor of Alphysics proving Einstein's General Theory of Relativity as long as NSF doles out grants for experimental proofs of General Relativity.
Doctor Gravytee: Fifty years ago when Einstein's General Relativity entered academia Alphysicists of the time were as hip as String theorists of today. Today General Relativity is a textbook fare. Doctors of Alphysics proved General Relativity so well and so many times that they cannot get enough of it and they are still proving it. It is easier to prove experimentally theories which are recognized by NSF as good theories to prove. There will be a Doctor of Alphysics proving Einstein's General Theory of Relativity as long as NSF doles out grants for experimental proofs of General Relativity.
Friday, October 13, 2006
Revolutions in Alphysics
Admin1: What does Revolution mean in Alphysics?
Doctor Gravytee: String Theory fully conforms to the modern consumer society.
A1: String Theory is always 100% *NEW* and *IMPROVED*.
Dr. G: Previously cosmogonical speculations such as Newton's laws were designed to be around for centuries. Generations of humans consumed the same cosmogonical speculation and were happy with it. In our fast-paced consumer society we throw away a perfectly good jacket after using it a few times and buy a new one. The same behavior is reflected in cosmogonical fashions as well. String Theory is designed to change every academic season.
A1: String revolutions are then just marketing of new and improved versions of the theory?
Dr. G: Exactly. "5% more Experimental" is a standard slogan in String Theory packaging. Experiment, like M-Theory, is a secret ingredient of the String Theory. Every season the theory gets more experimental by making testable predictions in farther and farther away in time. String theory experimentally predicts when the Big Crunch will happen to one-hundredth of a second. Since the Big Cruch will happen in the 11th dimension this also proves the existence of 11 dimensions.
A1: What happens to millions of pre-revolutionary papers written by Alphysicists when a new revolution is announced?
Dr. G: With the possibilities of new media Doctors of Alphysics output so much String Theory wisdom that every season they discard the accumulated junk and start over and call this process a revolution.
Doctor Gravytee: String Theory fully conforms to the modern consumer society.
A1: String Theory is always 100% *NEW* and *IMPROVED*.
Dr. G: Previously cosmogonical speculations such as Newton's laws were designed to be around for centuries. Generations of humans consumed the same cosmogonical speculation and were happy with it. In our fast-paced consumer society we throw away a perfectly good jacket after using it a few times and buy a new one. The same behavior is reflected in cosmogonical fashions as well. String Theory is designed to change every academic season.
A1: String revolutions are then just marketing of new and improved versions of the theory?
Dr. G: Exactly. "5% more Experimental" is a standard slogan in String Theory packaging. Experiment, like M-Theory, is a secret ingredient of the String Theory. Every season the theory gets more experimental by making testable predictions in farther and farther away in time. String theory experimentally predicts when the Big Crunch will happen to one-hundredth of a second. Since the Big Cruch will happen in the 11th dimension this also proves the existence of 11 dimensions.
A1: What happens to millions of pre-revolutionary papers written by Alphysicists when a new revolution is announced?
Dr. G: With the possibilities of new media Doctors of Alphysics output so much String Theory wisdom that every season they discard the accumulated junk and start over and call this process a revolution.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Marketing, Alphysics and String Theory
Admin1: Top three labels are Doctors of Alphysics, Marketing and String Theory.
Doctor Gravytee: How does the String Theory reach general public?
A1: Through popular books.
Dr. G: That is marketing. What is the subject of String Theory?
A1: It is cosmogony.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony means the chase of ultimates. Whether it is the ultimate smallest or the ultimate farthest or the ultimate container, String Theory has all the answers.
A1: As far as I know String Theory revolutionized Alphysics by revolutionizing itself every three years.
Dr. G: The revolution of the String Theory lies in its nothingness. String Theory explains nothing. It has been known to Doctors of Alphysics for millennia that the most ultimate answers are empty vessels. Today's Doctors reinvented the empty vessel of their ancestors in the most elegantly existential theory ever devised by Alphysicists. The Ultimate Unknown the M theory explains all. This is pure elegance.
Doctor Gravytee: How does the String Theory reach general public?
A1: Through popular books.
Dr. G: That is marketing. What is the subject of String Theory?
A1: It is cosmogony.
Dr. G: Yes. Cosmogony means the chase of ultimates. Whether it is the ultimate smallest or the ultimate farthest or the ultimate container, String Theory has all the answers.
A1: As far as I know String Theory revolutionized Alphysics by revolutionizing itself every three years.
Dr. G: The revolution of the String Theory lies in its nothingness. String Theory explains nothing. It has been known to Doctors of Alphysics for millennia that the most ultimate answers are empty vessels. Today's Doctors reinvented the empty vessel of their ancestors in the most elegantly existential theory ever devised by Alphysicists. The Ultimate Unknown the M theory explains all. This is pure elegance.
Monday, October 09, 2006
The separation of data from its display
Admin1: XML documents do not carry information about how to display data.
Dr. Gravytee: This is very unelegant and it won't be acceptable in Alphysics circles.
A1: Single XML tags are invented by the author of the XML document, browsers do not know if a tag like *table* describes an HTML table or a dining table.
Dr. G: In Alphysics a word *word* describes any word defined by the Doctor in that namespace.
A1: This is confusing. String Theory does not conform to namespace.
Dr. G: *namespace* is a word. Therefore, in Alphysics *namespace* means whatever I say it means now. Few minutes later I will use *namespace* to mean its opposite.
A1: So in Alphysics *table* means a dining table and an HTML table.
Dr. G: Centuries ago, when mathematics was a new topic and Doctors were inventing its rules displaying mathematics was through geometry. Today mathematical displays are pictorial.
A1: Therefore, in Alphysics mathematical displays are not mathematical but pictorial and polemical.
Dr. G: Surely. Nature spared us from the ubiquitous photoshop ball stretching the fabric of spacetimes. Such a thing does not exist in nature. Both spacetimes and its fabric and the photoshop ball are elegant branding.
A1: Very Confucian.
Dr. G: Confucius fought hard against the Doctors of Alphysics of his time to rectify the language so that table meant table but he did not succeed. After Confucius many have tried. They all failed. In the 17th century Fermat tried to rectify geometry in order to remove all the scholastic and Alphysical layers of junk Doctors added on geometrical figures in order to corrupt geometry so that they can use the authority of geometry to further their careers. Fermat too failed.
Dr. Gravytee: This is very unelegant and it won't be acceptable in Alphysics circles.
A1: Single XML tags are invented by the author of the XML document, browsers do not know if a tag like *table* describes an HTML table or a dining table.
Dr. G: In Alphysics a word *word* describes any word defined by the Doctor in that namespace.
A1: This is confusing. String Theory does not conform to namespace.
Dr. G: *namespace* is a word. Therefore, in Alphysics *namespace* means whatever I say it means now. Few minutes later I will use *namespace* to mean its opposite.
A1: So in Alphysics *table* means a dining table and an HTML table.
Dr. G: Centuries ago, when mathematics was a new topic and Doctors were inventing its rules displaying mathematics was through geometry. Today mathematical displays are pictorial.
A1: Therefore, in Alphysics mathematical displays are not mathematical but pictorial and polemical.
Dr. G: Surely. Nature spared us from the ubiquitous photoshop ball stretching the fabric of spacetimes. Such a thing does not exist in nature. Both spacetimes and its fabric and the photoshop ball are elegant branding.
A1: Very Confucian.
Dr. G: Confucius fought hard against the Doctors of Alphysics of his time to rectify the language so that table meant table but he did not succeed. After Confucius many have tried. They all failed. In the 17th century Fermat tried to rectify geometry in order to remove all the scholastic and Alphysical layers of junk Doctors added on geometrical figures in order to corrupt geometry so that they can use the authority of geometry to further their careers. Fermat too failed.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Scholastic Berlin Walls
Admin1: In today's society there are Berlin walls separating parts of knowledge. These boundaries are artificial. Nature is one. The boundaries are invented by Professional Doctors to protect their careers and the investment they made to themselves. These boundaries are good for Doctors' well being but they are not good for human well-being. Therefore, by pulling down these scholastic Berlin Walls dividing human knowledge into artificial parts the human progress will be helped. The origin of hording knowledge goes back to European peasant, the human squirrel.
Doctor Gravytee: Correct.
Doctor Gravytee: Correct.
Is science science
Admin1: In the list we have only two humans mentioned.
Doctor Gravytee: Not true. Remember Alphysics is marketing. In marketing we create an exact replica of the human and mythologize the replica. In rational systems this cannot be done. If you try to name two files on your desktop with the same name you would get an error message. Windows is a rational system. Two items with the same name would not make sense to a rational system. In Alphysics the more synonyms the better.
A1: In reality there are two Newtons and two Doctors Greene. One mythological and one human.
Dr. G: Yes. Alphysics uses the mythological Doctor Greene.
A1: Mythology is secular religion. So I should put Newton and Doctor Greene under religion?
Dr. G: Yes, in theory. But remember we don't want to use old and tired words. Religion is an old and tired word with an image problem. Alphysics is science. So create a category called science and put Alphysics and String Theory under that category.
A1: Will do.
Doctor Gravytee: Not true. Remember Alphysics is marketing. In marketing we create an exact replica of the human and mythologize the replica. In rational systems this cannot be done. If you try to name two files on your desktop with the same name you would get an error message. Windows is a rational system. Two items with the same name would not make sense to a rational system. In Alphysics the more synonyms the better.
A1: In reality there are two Newtons and two Doctors Greene. One mythological and one human.
Dr. G: Yes. Alphysics uses the mythological Doctor Greene.
A1: Mythology is secular religion. So I should put Newton and Doctor Greene under religion?
Dr. G: Yes, in theory. But remember we don't want to use old and tired words. Religion is an old and tired word with an image problem. Alphysics is science. So create a category called science and put Alphysics and String Theory under that category.
A1: Will do.
Derivation
Admin1: I updated the label list.
Doctor Gravytee: You did well with the list except that you failed.
A1: Thank you.
Dr. G: I noticed that you removed the synonyms.
A1: Yes.
Dr. G: What for? Synonyms are where Alphysics is. How can you remove them. You need to add more synonyms so that we can start doing Alphysics.
A1: I am learning.
Dr. G: In rational systems which are not yet achieved the supreme abzurd state of Alphysics synonyms are seen as errors. In a rational list language you would write synonyms on the same line. They are equivalent. They are definitions. It doesn't matter if you call Doctor Greene Doctor Greene Mr. Greene, Greene, or use his Columbia employee ID number to identify him. But in non-rational systems such as Alphysics we define as many synonyms as possible and we write them on separate lines to create an illusion of hierarchy.
A1: I see. This way derivation becomes possible.
Dr. G: Yes. You are a fast learner. If you write synonyms as synonyms there would be no papers to write because synonyms are synonyms. If you order the synonyms as if they were different entities and then cancel them by derivation to obtain the root element you could write several papers.
A1: Isn't this a waste of time? Why write all those superfluous synonyms in order to cancel them?
Dr. G: Derivation is a Very Old Scholastic Polemics. It is glorious. Derivation is synonymous with Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: You did well with the list except that you failed.
A1: Thank you.
Dr. G: I noticed that you removed the synonyms.
A1: Yes.
Dr. G: What for? Synonyms are where Alphysics is. How can you remove them. You need to add more synonyms so that we can start doing Alphysics.
A1: I am learning.
Dr. G: In rational systems which are not yet achieved the supreme abzurd state of Alphysics synonyms are seen as errors. In a rational list language you would write synonyms on the same line. They are equivalent. They are definitions. It doesn't matter if you call Doctor Greene Doctor Greene Mr. Greene, Greene, or use his Columbia employee ID number to identify him. But in non-rational systems such as Alphysics we define as many synonyms as possible and we write them on separate lines to create an illusion of hierarchy.
A1: I see. This way derivation becomes possible.
Dr. G: Yes. You are a fast learner. If you write synonyms as synonyms there would be no papers to write because synonyms are synonyms. If you order the synonyms as if they were different entities and then cancel them by derivation to obtain the root element you could write several papers.
A1: Isn't this a waste of time? Why write all those superfluous synonyms in order to cancel them?
Dr. G: Derivation is a Very Old Scholastic Polemics. It is glorious. Derivation is synonymous with Alphysics.
String Theory is here to stay
Admin1: Do you have a grudge against String Theory?
Doctor Gravytee: Regardless of the recent books against it the String Theory is strong and well. String Theory is here to stay. Now there are more Doctors of Philosophy of the Strings than all the other Doctors of Philosophy combined.
A1: But why does the String Theory exist? Is it here to replace Alphysics?
Dr. G: String Theory is a manifestation of Alphysics. String Theory is the buzzword we use to sell books.
A1: Is there another reason besides selling books why String Theory exists?
Dr. G: There is the official party line and then there is the true reason. The official party line is that two different nebulous monstors created by Alphysicists are found to be incompatible by their creators. Alphysicists have been trying to reconcile these two abzurd by producing more extreme abzurd. String Theory has been chosen by the publishing industry as the best profitable of the many competing Alphysics scenarios. The publishing industry has chosen Doctor Greene as the spokesperson of this modern religion as science.
A1: And what is the true reason?
Dr. G: The true reason why String Theory exists is because Newton existed.
Doctor Gravytee: Regardless of the recent books against it the String Theory is strong and well. String Theory is here to stay. Now there are more Doctors of Philosophy of the Strings than all the other Doctors of Philosophy combined.
A1: But why does the String Theory exist? Is it here to replace Alphysics?
Dr. G: String Theory is a manifestation of Alphysics. String Theory is the buzzword we use to sell books.
A1: Is there another reason besides selling books why String Theory exists?
Dr. G: There is the official party line and then there is the true reason. The official party line is that two different nebulous monstors created by Alphysicists are found to be incompatible by their creators. Alphysicists have been trying to reconcile these two abzurd by producing more extreme abzurd. String Theory has been chosen by the publishing industry as the best profitable of the many competing Alphysics scenarios. The publishing industry has chosen Doctor Greene as the spokesperson of this modern religion as science.
A1: And what is the true reason?
Dr. G: The true reason why String Theory exists is because Newton existed.
Is Alphysics legal
Admin1: What Latin is to Law Mathematics is to Alphysics.
Doctor Gravytee: Exactly. In Alphysics we use
- specialized words and phrases unique or nearly unique to Alphysics, such as, "it is easy to prove that..." and "it is well known that...." "we have proved in our previous paper that..."
- everyday English words that when used in Alphysics have different meanings from everyday usage, such as action, string, force, to know, everything, zero, one, equal to... the list goes on and on. We actively and explicitly corrupt the English language and we are very proud of it.
- archaic vocabulary. Alphysics employs a fairly large number of outdated words and phrases that were formerly part of everyday English but are today rare except in Alphysics. Most of them date from the 17th century. Most are long abandoned outside Alphysics. The entirety of almathematics can be cited as example of archaic vocabulary.
- loan words and phrases from other languages: in this category are terms derived from German and the mechanism in German of combining words to make a new word, most famous example of which is the spacetime.
A1: There is a need for Plain English movement in Alphysics too.
Dr. G: There is no such need. Archaism is an essential ingredient of Alphysics. Legalese is bad but Alphysics is twice as bad as legalese but we market our brand so well that Alphysics stands for Science.
A1: Alphysics = Legalese?
Dr. G: No. Alphysics = 2Legalese. Legal professionals are totally ignorant of marketing. They think marketing is bad and they do not protect their brand. We use the legalistic archaic obscurantism we call Alphysics to obtain six-figure book contracts in order to explain what we obscure.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Bugs are features of the Theory
Admin1: Then, what is mathematics?
Dr. Gravytee: Mathematics is the XML of the 17th century.
A1: Or was.
Dr. G: Yes. Was. Today's mathematics has no error that is why mathematics is so bloated.
A1: Alphysics is doubly bloated.
Dr. G: In XML the program does not continue to process when it finds an error. But with HTML it is possible to create documents with lots of errors. This is the reason why HTML browsers are so bloated and why they are so incompatible. Each browser has its own way of figuring out what a document should look like when it encounters an HTML error.
A1: Wow! It's like, I mean, browsers are Doctors of Alphysics!
Dr. G: In Alphysics each Doctor of Alphysics has his own way of defining his own favorite Universe. And each of these Universes are based on an error in mathematics.
A1: For example, division by zero became the famous black hole!
Dr. G: You see why Doctors of Alphysics will never give up their authority over mathematics. If and when Doctors of Alphysics give up their authority over mathematics and, say, chose XML as their professional language they will no longer be able to invent absurdities based on linguistic abuse and sell them as true science in bestselling books.
A1: That's a scary thought. But it will never happen.
Dr. G: True. It will never happen. Once a bureaucracy is created, and in this case it is a lucrative bureaucracy feeding the giant entertainment industry, it will never go away. Never.
A1: But it will change its name.
Dr. G: Yes.
Dr. Gravytee: Mathematics is the XML of the 17th century.
A1: Or was.
Dr. G: Yes. Was. Today's mathematics has no error that is why mathematics is so bloated.
A1: Alphysics is doubly bloated.
Dr. G: In XML the program does not continue to process when it finds an error. But with HTML it is possible to create documents with lots of errors. This is the reason why HTML browsers are so bloated and why they are so incompatible. Each browser has its own way of figuring out what a document should look like when it encounters an HTML error.
A1: Wow! It's like, I mean, browsers are Doctors of Alphysics!
Dr. G: In Alphysics each Doctor of Alphysics has his own way of defining his own favorite Universe. And each of these Universes are based on an error in mathematics.
A1: For example, division by zero became the famous black hole!
Dr. G: You see why Doctors of Alphysics will never give up their authority over mathematics. If and when Doctors of Alphysics give up their authority over mathematics and, say, chose XML as their professional language they will no longer be able to invent absurdities based on linguistic abuse and sell them as true science in bestselling books.
A1: That's a scary thought. But it will never happen.
Dr. G: True. It will never happen. Once a bureaucracy is created, and in this case it is a lucrative bureaucracy feeding the giant entertainment industry, it will never go away. Never.
A1: But it will change its name.
Dr. G: Yes.
Friday, October 06, 2006
Alphysics by Association
Admin1: To claim to have measured the radiation from the mythological origin of the cosmos seems like another example of Scholastic Sham.
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. It is a good example of Alphysics by Association.
A1: I see. It is like experimental String Theory.
Dr. G: Of course. In Alphysics, more specifically in String Theory, the experimenter measures the period of the moving part of a gadget. He then associates his measurement with an absurd claim made by the String Theorist.
A1: When Alphysics will become a regulated industry such behavior will be non-compliant.
Dr. G: Alphysics will not be regulated.
Doctor Gravytee: Not at all. It is a good example of Alphysics by Association.
A1: I see. It is like experimental String Theory.
Dr. G: Of course. In Alphysics, more specifically in String Theory, the experimenter measures the period of the moving part of a gadget. He then associates his measurement with an absurd claim made by the String Theorist.
A1: When Alphysics will become a regulated industry such behavior will be non-compliant.
Dr. G: Alphysics will not be regulated.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
White noise analysis yields Nobel Prize
Admin1: Congratulations! Two alphysicists won the Nobel Prize.
Doctory Gravytee: They are not true Alphysicists. Everyone wants to be alphysicists. Alphysics is glamorous. Database analysis is not glamorous.
A1: They are awarded the Nobel Alphysics for this year. And cosmogony and cosmology are well-established alphysical subjects.
Dr. G: Alphysicists have been inventing defined cosmoses for millennia. These Nobel Laureates are really number crunchers. Their profession is data reduction not alphysics. Alphysics is an elegant science. No alphysicist would work for NASA.
A1: I see. There are three different fields: Cosmogony, database analysis and Alphysics.
Dr. G: These three are irreconcilably disconnected. For political reasons NASA must have a "scientific payload." They need to justify their budget. This has been the tradition. It is curious that NASA considers cosmogony science.
A1: But the Nobel Laureates measured the radiation predicted by the Big Bang theory.
Dr. G: Really? The most distinguished Nobel Laureates measured local white noise. They obtained an immense database made of white noise. They analyzed this white noise and drew a media pleasing attractive map. They never measured anything else.
Doctory Gravytee: They are not true Alphysicists. Everyone wants to be alphysicists. Alphysics is glamorous. Database analysis is not glamorous.
A1: They are awarded the Nobel Alphysics for this year. And cosmogony and cosmology are well-established alphysical subjects.
Dr. G: Alphysicists have been inventing defined cosmoses for millennia. These Nobel Laureates are really number crunchers. Their profession is data reduction not alphysics. Alphysics is an elegant science. No alphysicist would work for NASA.
A1: I see. There are three different fields: Cosmogony, database analysis and Alphysics.
Dr. G: These three are irreconcilably disconnected. For political reasons NASA must have a "scientific payload." They need to justify their budget. This has been the tradition. It is curious that NASA considers cosmogony science.
A1: But the Nobel Laureates measured the radiation predicted by the Big Bang theory.
Dr. G: Really? The most distinguished Nobel Laureates measured local white noise. They obtained an immense database made of white noise. They analyzed this white noise and drew a media pleasing attractive map. They never measured anything else.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Elitist obscurantism
Admin1: Why is the String Theory so crucial in human understanding of nature?
Doctor Gravytee: It is not. String Theory is an elitist obscurantism who markets the absurd as the true science.
A1: In other words, String Theory is the modern name of scholasticism.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes. Scholasticism has acquired a bad reputation so we had to rename it to something more marketable.
Doctor Gravytee: It is not. String Theory is an elitist obscurantism who markets the absurd as the true science.
A1: In other words, String Theory is the modern name of scholasticism.
Dr. Gravytee: Yes. Scholasticism has acquired a bad reputation so we had to rename it to something more marketable.
Monday, October 02, 2006
Marketing Alphysics
Admin1: Clicking the "Marketing" label under Labels pulls up three of your greatest posts: The Equality Symbol, Not Even Wrong, and The Hierarchy.
Doctor Gravytee: Marketing drives Alphysics. Not Even Wrong is a Very Scholastic Old Polemics. The Third Truth is loved by Doctors of any kind. And every generation discovers it anew and gives it a new label and sells more books.
A1: Do you equate Marketing to polemics?
Dr. G: The equality sign is a dangerous polemical tool. It has absolute authority. Since it defines the sentence of the language used by Doctors of Alphysics, the almathematics, therefore, it has tremendous authority. Most people cannot even look at a sentence which contains some symbols arranged on either side of an equality sign. They are so scared of such a monster.
A1: The Hierarchy?
Dr. G: The Hierarchy is marketing too. Doctors of Alphysics use the strict hierarchical structure of their industry as proof of its absolute authority.
A1: Alphysics lies in the fringes of the giant entertainment industry therefore it is inevitable that it is driven by marketing.
Dr. G: Nature is written in the language of marketing.
Doctor Gravytee: Marketing drives Alphysics. Not Even Wrong is a Very Scholastic Old Polemics. The Third Truth is loved by Doctors of any kind. And every generation discovers it anew and gives it a new label and sells more books.
A1: Do you equate Marketing to polemics?
Dr. G: The equality sign is a dangerous polemical tool. It has absolute authority. Since it defines the sentence of the language used by Doctors of Alphysics, the almathematics, therefore, it has tremendous authority. Most people cannot even look at a sentence which contains some symbols arranged on either side of an equality sign. They are so scared of such a monster.
A1: The Hierarchy?
Dr. G: The Hierarchy is marketing too. Doctors of Alphysics use the strict hierarchical structure of their industry as proof of its absolute authority.
A1: Alphysics lies in the fringes of the giant entertainment industry therefore it is inevitable that it is driven by marketing.
Dr. G: Nature is written in the language of marketing.
Sunday, October 01, 2006
The greatest genius ever lived
Admin1: According to a new study Newton has been rated the greatest genius ever lived?
Doctor Gravytee: Newton was indeed a genius.
A1: What kind of proof do you have for that?
Dr. G: Newton discovered gravity.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Newton defined the laws of the universe.
A1: Are you talking about the so-called Newton's laws?
Dr. G: Yes. Newton's laws are still valid even if we need to modify them here and there a little bit.
A1: You don't think there is a Newton myth.
Dr. G: There is a Newton myth. And rightly so. Newton's genius is beyond any mortal's comprehension.
A1: But Newton did not know about the String Theory. Newton did not know about Einstein's theory of General Relativity. It seems that since he failed to discover such elegant theories of nature he cannot be such a huge genius.
Dr. G: There is no measure of genius. Newton established the modern field of science today we call Alphysics. He is the founding father of Alphysics. To recognize this fact Doctors of Alphysics defined the fundamental unit of Alphysics to be Newton.
A1: Have you read Newton's Principia?
Dr. G: No. What for?
A1: But Newton's Principia is the greatest scientific book ever written.
Dr. G: No doubt about that.
A1: Is it also the fundamental book of Alphysics?
Dr. G: It is. But most Doctors of Alphysics do not know this fact.
Doctor Gravytee: Newton was indeed a genius.
A1: What kind of proof do you have for that?
Dr. G: Newton discovered gravity.
A1: What does this mean?
Dr. G: Newton defined the laws of the universe.
A1: Are you talking about the so-called Newton's laws?
Dr. G: Yes. Newton's laws are still valid even if we need to modify them here and there a little bit.
A1: You don't think there is a Newton myth.
Dr. G: There is a Newton myth. And rightly so. Newton's genius is beyond any mortal's comprehension.
A1: But Newton did not know about the String Theory. Newton did not know about Einstein's theory of General Relativity. It seems that since he failed to discover such elegant theories of nature he cannot be such a huge genius.
Dr. G: There is no measure of genius. Newton established the modern field of science today we call Alphysics. He is the founding father of Alphysics. To recognize this fact Doctors of Alphysics defined the fundamental unit of Alphysics to be Newton.
A1: Have you read Newton's Principia?
Dr. G: No. What for?
A1: But Newton's Principia is the greatest scientific book ever written.
Dr. G: No doubt about that.
A1: Is it also the fundamental book of Alphysics?
Dr. G: It is. But most Doctors of Alphysics do not know this fact.
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